Want to hear the truth about Thanksgiving?
Well, it’s great.
As long as it is at someone else’s house!!
Spend 2 days cleaning up your home. If you are anything like me. Procrastinate so much you still end up doing some crazy kind of shuffle and hide so your house is presentable before the first guest arrives.
Spend a few hundred dollars shopping for the essentials..then send the Hubby out in a panic because you forgot the Cranberry sauce that Grandma simply must have.
Oh good grief. Don’t forget the booze eh?
Then let the cooking begin!
Let’s talk Turkey.
Raw Poultry is truly disgusting.
Seriously! Have you ever really looked at that poor dimpled skinned turkey before you stuff it’s butt and neck full of bread and seasoning? Ug. Big Gag factor. BIG! Plus you are supposed to massage it with butter? Huh? Forget it. If I’m not massaging my Husband, I’m sure as hell not massaging a dead bird.
Get that bird in the oven in the nick of time.
Yell at the kids that yes they must wear the clothes you put out for them.
Beg your Hubby to turn the football off, just for a couple of hours.
Sprint through the shower.
Coral the pets.
One last vacuum.
Check the potatoes and disgusting bird.
Ahhhh. Ready.
.
.
.
.
Then they are freakin late! Are you kidding me.
When all your tardy guests do finally arrive. Get a nice visit in.
Eat that huge meal you spent 2 days preparing for as fast as any Big Mac Combo.
Sit back in your squeaky wood dinette chair that is only used 3 times a year and enjoy your moment of satisfaction.
There, did you enjoy it?
Good moment over.
Now go look at the flipin dishes!
It looks like a small bomb went off in there!
But don’t worry, I’m sure you lovely FAMILY will help. Nope,they have to run.
Mwah, Mwah.
Do dishes for two more days.
UG.
The only saving grace.
You get the leftovers.
Happy Belated Thanksgiving Y’all.
Hope you get to go to your Mother In Laws House!
Hahahaha!
I LERRRRRRRRRVE Thanksgiving Dinner…
See…
I must prepare it. I don’t trust anyone else and their sanitation processes…Because see I use:
Gloves
Bleach
Bleach, and, oh yeah,
Bleach
And I am very particular about my stuffing, and how the turkey is cooked, and I MUST make Italian Broccoli, not that green bean casserole thingie…and OH! The kids and I have to make the pumpkin pie, and I MUST make my cranberry orange relish…and I use paper plates…PJ’s must be worn by anyone that comes over to eat, and they must be willing to eat in the dark, by candlelight, so they don’t see the messes I didn’t clean up, and PRAISE THE LORD my husband doesn’t watch football! So I shower the night before and don’t even put on make up. Then the next day I take the rest of the stuffing, dark meat, drippings I saved, celery, onion, carrots, and make a fantabulous turkey stuffing soup and some wicked gooey mac and cheese.
Thanksgiving is my most favorite meal to make. Wanna come over for a second helping?
OMG, this sounds so familiar! Glad you survived and yes, so did we. Now if only Christmas dinner wasn’t just a little over two months away!
Deb
I think you just described EVERY family event at my house minus the turkey. Honestly, it’s clean up before, during and after & a total pain in the ass sometimes.
I started doing Thanksgiving at my house a couple years ago just for the leftovers. š
Hope you were able to find some bliss amidst the chaos! A big, leftover turkey sandwich with a slice of leftover pie always does it for me!
Oh dear I totally forgot it is Thanksgiving in your neck of the woods! Ah yes, did that last year, FIASCO!! I had too many managers in my kitchen…literally looked like one of those damn reality shows.
But the kicker…I love to cook! So I took my gluttonous pain in pride.
Happy Thanksgiving and I bet you pulled the whole ordeal off BEAUTIFULLY!
I lucked out! A friend invited my family over this year. I normally have the crowd. No stuffing the turkey’s but for me this year.
My beef with Thanksgiving is family related and due to that, I am contemplating boycotting it, staying home, and cooking lobster.
But it’s so fun!! I want to cook a turkey this year. I’ve never cooked one. I’m excited to make it for my neighbors! Hopefully I’ll cook it properly and we won’t end up at a Chinese Food resturant. lol
I see that Canadian Thanksgiving is the same chaotic event that it is here in the states. Wish me luck, as our is a month or so away – although, my husband is the cook. I’m the cleaner.
But…I guess being with friends and family is worth it.
Last year I begged my family to have Thanksgiving in our new house. Thankfully, my incredible in-laws took over with the turkey as I found myself absolutely clueless and frozen on what to do with the enormous, headless corpse.
This year I am begging to have it somewhere else where I can sit lazy and happily drinking all the wine and stuffing myself, instead of the turkey.
Thank you for visiting my website. Glad to find other wannabe travelers that I can commiserate with.
yea i TOTALLY hate the mess that cooking for a large group entails.. seriously!
Left overs are the BEST! Hope you had a good one! š
See, this is why Turkey day is at my MOM’s!! And, she gives us the leftovers. Everybody wins!!
Thanksgiving food is my least favorite all year….my entire family loves it but my Hub and I really don’t. LOL. Thankfully we also aren’t hosting yet..my Hub’s entire family eats and then sleeps. No thanks. š
LOL, I’m dreading out Thanksgiving day too.. Sounds you described my house to a T!