How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

The Cursed Pool

in Everyday on


Stupid Pool.
Why do you hate me?
No one wants to swim in a green slimey swamp.

I will show you. No toxic floaties will keep my babies from enjoying the sunshine.

Turn ON your foolish pool pump.
TURN ON.
Kick.
Ouch!
Told ya to turn on..

I am vacuuming but all the freaking dirt and slime is just blowing around.
What the hell is going on?

Stomp

Stomp

Back and forth I walk like an idiot. From pool to pump, from pump to pool.

Wiggle a knob, adjust a lever. Something has got to work.

Basket is full of dead leaves and worms. Lovely. That could be part of my problem.

Gross..mashed up worm bits and beetle bits. Clean.It.Out. (used a stick)

Back to the vacuum.

Oh. For crying out loud. Why is the green recycling? Why do I see streams of green through my crystal clear water?? This vacuum is still not working right.

Where is that creepy pool guy who talks to my boobs when I need him?

Oh Gee. It helps if the hose is plugged in.

Ha Ha!! Dirt is now miraculously sucking up the vacuum hose, through the basket and running all over my driveway. That’s Okay, I’ll wash the driveway down later. Must get slime out of pool.

I’ve been out here how long?

2 1/2 hours?

Enough is enough. Where is the pool shock.

Take that you stupid pool. Shock You!

See you tomorrow for Round 2.

    • Comments

    1. Thank you for visiting me and liking my blog 🙂

      I hope you get your pool sorted out in the end – your kids will love you for it!

    2. LMAO!!! I have been there…not much fun. I will go to the community pool this summer (and stick to sprinklers at home!). Great blog…glad I found you 😉

    3. Oh my, this post cracks me up! I imagine how hilarious you must have looked for the neighborinos around ya:))) But at least you beat the crack out of that stupid pool right?:)
      Oh and thanks for commenting on my blog the other day!
      Happy Sunday

    4. YES! Thank you, i am so glad i am not the only one that had this battle when we had our pool (recently moved to AZ without a pool! what is wrong with us?!?!)

      we will be putting anew one in next summer, i just ope this same scenario doesn’t continue.

      LOVE your cue blog, mind if I follow and steal your button????

    5. It took my husband close to a week to finish cleaning out my in laws’ pool so the kids could swim. It is such a pain. I don’t think they realized how much work it was when they bought it.

    7. I was missing my pool until you mentioned this. We moved and the kids are grown so we went for just the spa this time. (I do miss the pool in the summer) Good luck!

    8. It is always something isn’t it? Having a home is never ending work!!
      Worms and beetles and slim oh my, but yesterday, I had to fish out 2 small snakes. :0
      Good luck in round 2

    9. Uggghh…I remember green pool days and shock-its. Good luck to you. I finally have a pool…and a pool guy:-) He has managed to keep the green away…so far. Good thing, as I have blondes and the minute it gets screwed up, hellooooo green hair. hahaha
      Hope you get in that pool today!

    10. LMAO!!! So glad that I do not have a pool. We have a city one about a 5 min walk from my house. If I give the boys a $5, they will go away for a few hours to eat pool snacks and leave me alone!!!

    11. LMAO! The house I grew up in had a pool and it was the neighborhood hang out for all our friends, I loved it!! But, every summer my dad would complain about the opening and cleaning of the pool. We would get so impatient waiting for the green sludge to go away that one summer we put a giant round float in and piled on it to float around in the nasty water. My dad had a fit! Now that I am a mom I can see why and I can understand why he cursed at the pool so often, LOL!!!

    12. I do not miss cleaning our pool. Not one bit. The darn thing never actually made it to clean. And the lining just seemed to attract slime. Good luck tomorrow. Hopefully the shock worked well enough that you can get it all cleaned up and ready for use. 🙂

    14. YOU CRACK ME UP! I remember those days of getting the pool ready for summer, the pool guy, and my parents. I’d stare at them from the upstairs window, watching, waiting, sweating (not really) LOL, but I couldn’t wait to jump in.. how I miss those days.