To be read in your best “Bridgette Jones’s Diary” voice because that is how I wrote it!
Weight: Not talking about it, should stop with the chocolate.
Alcohol Units: Zero – Pity.
Cigarettes: Zero –Not a smoker, not much of a victory here.
Dear Diary,
Encountered very wrinkly old gal driving her besty in beat up ol car. Their combined age 170? Old Bitty cut me off at Starbucks drive through and I screamed, okay, muttered rather loudly under my breath “You old bitty, if you can’t see over the steering wheel it is time to turn in your car keys!” “Invest in a booster seat.” So proud. Clearly do not NEED more coffee.
Ran into unkindly gossipy neighbour in the drug store today. No escape. Original plans had me only picking up an ice pack for my sore back. Seriously considered purchase of hemorrhoid cream, wart remover and a pregnancy test just to see what kind of rumours she would start. Hubby thinks it’s cute that I have an arch enemy, I think it is just tiresome.
The University boys are back from Christmas break. Got good and checked out at the deli counter. At first flattered, then very weirded out as it dawned on me that at 39 I am actually old enough to be said University Boys Mama! *shiver
Daughter made up and sent out birthday invitations. One particular little 11 year old can not make the festivities. Did not sigh, was not sad. Did little dance of joy as that child rubs me the wrong way! I am horrible person.
Clearly I am going to hell. Am evil retched person very thankful that senior citizens, arch enemies and children can not read minds.
End of evil thoughts for today.
Girlfriend, I will save you the seat in hell right next to me.
well thank goodness for grace…smiles.
Oh I am so sorry things went yucky.. I have a giveaway starting tomorrow that you should stop on you can win.. I hope you have a great week..
OMG I Can not stand old drivers. They get on my last nerve. Totally read the post in the style of Bridget Jones. A+ and you are not going to hell. You are too awesome for that place.
If that’s all it takes to get into hell – then I guess I should expect my invitation to be engraved because my thoughts have been much worse!
I totally read Bridget in this post!
We would so hang out if we lived near each other.
No worries, I think it takes more than that to get into hell.
The neighbor run in. Always a good time.
Oh I think you’re doing pretty well! And honest, too, which is much appreciated!
Well, hell must be full of fun people!
Hahaha! At least you are honest… ; ) Teehee.
Not evil just normal thoughts.
If we’re not feeling good, it’s ok to be bad sometimes, hahaha!
it’s like you have to blame it on someone or something. Me, if i’m not ok, I clean.Weird, huh?
I really feel like we should have to take our drivers test every so many years… but then I wonder if I would pass or screw up! lol I’ve never been a great test taker!
Feel the same way about the seniors and everything else you had to say. I appreciate your honesty. It’s refreshing.
See you in Hell.