My Dad called me last night. All kinds of excited. His first question “So, what furniture do you want from the cottage, were selling”. Dad said what? Huh?
The parents have decided that it is time to sell the old family cottage they have been using as a home for the past 20 years and downsize to a condo. Mom and Dad put me on the dreaded speaker phone and chatted on and on about the benefits of condo living, the proximity to the community pool, beach access, and how they won’t have to do yard work or stairs anymore. Were they trying to convince me or themselves?
I looked at pictures with them (on line) as they chatted about furniture placement and all of their things they are going to have to get rid of.
After nearly an hour, I congratulated them on their big move and hung up. Then looked at my Hubby and with one big crocodile tear rolling down my cheek asked him
“Why the hell am I finding this so upsetting?”.
I knew the answer and didn’t need him to spell it out for me.
It’s not that they are packing up 20 years of memories, the closest thing we have had to a “family home” for Thanksgivings and Christmas celebrations. It’s not that they are selling the place I ran to when I had the big news to share that we were expecting our first baby. The place where I know my kids always have a room to stay. It’s not that they so easily part with their prized possessions while I seem to accumulate everyone else’s junk in my basement.
It was the sudden realization that… my folks are getting old.
The cottage has become too much for them. My Dad is afraid he can’t handle the stairs much longer. He just re-painted the outside and doesn’t ever want to do it again. The roof will need work soon and that is too hard. There is grass and snow and gardening and and and ……it is just too much.
Sigh. I’m not ready for my youngest to turn 9, my oldest to creep ever closer to 12 or for my parents to get old.
Can someone please stop the clock? Just for a little while…..
Psst 2 Days Until the Toy GiveAway
I can relate to this post both with my own parents and my inlaws. The other day my FIL was talking about how hard it was for him to get out of low chairs and it just really struck me how much he’s aged in the last five years.
Sigh.
Stopping by from the Follow Me. I’m Canadian bloghop!
My parents are “going fast.” I did not realize until I decided to stay home. They are forgetful, wobbly, etc. This has devastated me! I also want time to stop!
My parents both died when they were in their early 50’s. so I won’t have to deal with this, but I do totally relate to losing the family home. It might sound silly, but I found it devastating.
I can imagine how this can be a bit a a realization. However, thankfully they aren’t stubborn and continue to hold on to responsibilities that will not allow them to enjoy life as the mature. I;ve seen that and it’s really hard on the adult kids.
If I could figure out how to stop time even for a moment I would totally do it.
right there with you babe!!
i look at my dad now.. and his hair is almost ALL grey.. and if i think of it too long.. i get super sad…
it also makes me sad when i hear teens playing music really loud in their car while driving and it makes me mad.. AND THAT made me realize i was getting old…
aaarrgghhh! hate it!!
Oh, I feel for you. Time marches on.
So, what does it mean when I want to downsize MY house? Like right now…oldville here I come. 🙂
Whoever said getting old was the prime of your life…LIED!!
Come by when you can…
http://www.frugaltractormom.blogspot.com
It’s hard, I know. My dad turns 68 today. The one thing that might help is that fact you still have them in your life. So many of my friends have lost parents. Some of them never saw their grandkids grow-up.
In addition, when I was teaching, I had a little boy who lost his mom when he was 4. He will never get to experience any of the things you mentioned with his mom. Hopefully this helps.
It’s hard though. It all goes by so quickly.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I still have 3 grandparents alive and can’t imagine life without them or my parents.
Oh, I wish for the same thing.
smiles. my last one goes to school on monday…i hear another tick of the clock…ack!
My parents moved out of our family home last October. They’d been at that address for 27 years. I still have dreams that they live there.
It’s a tough road watching our parents age, but hopefully it will be easier on them to live in a place that they don’t have to work to maintain. Maybe all that social interaction will keep them young at heart.
If I could, I’d be with you stopping the clock!
I can’t believe that all three of my children are grown. Or that I have three grandchildren. Or that my parents sold and moved to a retirement community. Time marches on.
I think that part of the difficulty with accepting their decision is that you lose the emotional bond you have with their house. The memories there. It happened with me too when they decided to move on.
But it’s their life and their choice, and ultimately their happiness.
I can totally relate to this post. It makes me soo sad and scared when I see the signs that my parents are aging. I wish that I could stop the hands of time.