It was a rare event. Three free hours with no Hubby, no kids. I could have headed home and done some laundry, paid those bills read some blogs. I decided to take a walk on the wild side and actually do something for me. Off to my little nail salon for a wee bit of pampering. With the help of my fancy hands free blue tooth I managed to secure myself the very last nail appointment of the day. This might be the best idea I have had in a long time. Was going to get myself some of these.
I arrived just in time to say goodbye to the assistant nail tech and have a quick chat with the second last customer of the day. I’m all kinds of friendly like that. It wasn’t long before I was enjoying the familiar gossipy talk Hyde always offers up when I mange to squeeze in a visit. He filed, and laughed and chatted. I tried to be witty and keep up.
Suddenly the atmosphere in the tiny nail salon changed. I could feel it, I could see it on Hyde’s face, but to be honest I didn’t know what the hell was going on. A tiny little girl walked up to where we were seated.
Hyde, you have been served.
Ummm Awkward.
Yeah this little trip to the nail salon. Not so much fun for me anymore. Even less fun for Hyde.
He needed me to help him decipher the paperwork. English is not his first language. He is being sued for full custody of his 2 week old son. Gut punch.
Now I am usually all about the Mamas, but Hyde is in a tough place.
He is a first generation immigrant from Vietnam. He is looking after his elderly parents who are not well, and speak no English. They live with him. This is expected in his culture. It is his honor and his duty. His parents have told him if he try’s to bring this girlfriend OR his son home, they will not “be recognized”. Then …Hyde will be disowned.
Hyde told me if he let’s his son go “he will never in his life be happy”. Yet, if try’s to remain involved in his sons life, he will lose both parents, bring disgrace to his family and “never in his life be happy”.
You know what is not a lot of fun? Having a man paint your nails with tears in his eyes.
You know what is less fun? Being that man and being forced to pick between your culture, your parents……..or your newborn son.
I’m a free thinking, independent, self centered? Canadian girl. I know what I would do. Easy for me. My heart belongs to my children, not my culture. My parents would lose in this game of school yard pick. I don’t know what our friend Hyde is going to do. I think it’s harder for him.
What would you do?
Opps! I may have left out a very important part of the story! Hyde is not married!
I’m actually confused? Why can’t he have a child at home. How does their culture have babies and how do the babies live and survive if they are to be disowned and not recognized for the parent’s that stay with their own son? That’s even a paradox in itself… How come they got to raise their son and live with Hyde. But doesn’t get to live with his? Some traditions are confusing, and very unfair. I would not follow that part of my tradition if it was part of my culture regardless. I don’t have kids but it’s a mother’s intuition. I have to take care of my babies.
I also wonder. Does Hydes child live with the mother?
I feel for Hyde and I wish him all the best! I hope he makes the right choices and everything works out for him 🙁 fingers x!
We live in such a different world than Hyde.
It is easy for us to make that decision, obviously we would choose our child.
For his culture, they don’t abandon their families. I guess that his parents didn’t approve of his girlfriend (I believe they must get their parents approval to get married) and they just see his baby as a simple consequence of his actions.
I really feel bad for the decision he has to make!
Poor guy.
The decision would be easy for me, though. I wouldn’t even have to think about it. Nobody gets between me and my babies.
Oh how awful for him. I don’t have any children, but I know I would choose them. What an incredibly sad situation.
I’d choose my kids too, but culture is far more entrenched in others than in me. Wow, I don’t envy him the situation. Poor guy.
I understand culture and tradition but never would I make my child choose between me and his own child. Awful situation. I hope for the best for Hyde.
My little one would come first and if the culture or family did not like it. Then it would be a loss for them not me.. Poor guy.. Hugs to him.
wow. yeah it would be my family first…my kids that is…tough spot…glad you were there to help though…smiles.
I hope things will work out for him.
Screw duty. At least, duty’s fine as long as you don’t let it mess with your kids.
I don’t know what I would do, but I agree that it’s a bit of a killjoy to think about these things while trying to pamper yourself.
That is so sad. I usually am all for the mamas too, but this is a no win situation!
I’d pick the child. Easy.
He’s in a tough position, though. Their culture is much different than ours. Hopefully his parents can accept this and everyone can live happily together. Just don’t know. I feel bad for the guy.
First of all, I’m so sorry you didn’t completely enjoy your three hours of “me” time. I know how precious and rare that is. Hyde is between a rock and a hard place, but personally I think his parents are being extremely unfair. If talking things through with them doesn’t work out, I’d say “go with your child”…is it even a choice?
I’d have to turn my back on parents who’d take my child away from me like that. That’s so unloving.