Okay, Okay I get, it. There are NO more Saturdays until Christmas. There’s shopping to be done, errands to be run, you all have places to be go. The pressure is ON. But does this give you permission to be a class A jerk. (um and that’s the edited version) Because jerk is not what I was yelling when I was all by my lonesome trying find a parking spot at the mall this weekend. So just to let you all know that things are not always so sunshiney and bright here in the suburbs, here are 5 things I didn’t yell (well at least that you could hear) when I did some super ridiculous last minute shopping this weekend.
- As I sat with my “clicker” on, sitting ever so patiently for the woman I had stalked to her car to pull out of her damn parking spot already, I was listening to a little Michale Buble on the radio. I was feeling a little zen. It hadn’t taken me too long at all to track down a spot. As she backed out a stupid little Camry drove aggressively AROUND me and zipped into the spot I was clearly waiting for! “ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME?”. I may have yelled inside my giant SUV. Yes, I was driving a big ass SUV it’s not like that Camry didn’t see me. What an ass.
- Oh teenage girl you did NOT just cut in front of me in line at Starbucks. How dumb are you? Never, ever cut the line at a coffee place. Especially when there’s a line up of suburban Mama’s behind you trying to get ‘er done!
- Dear Stranger in the toy store. “Deodorant is your friend”. That is all.
- Dear Cashier: No I do NOT want to sign up for your stupid in store credit card as I frantically try and check out and make it back in time to grab my youngest from her dance class. And you know what? I REALLY wish you hadn’t asked the 15 people in front of me in line if they wanted a shiny new credit card today either. Why why WHY when the line-up to check out is 15 people long must you make the process to get out of your store so much longer by offering an in-store credit card. Or if you must offer that service, and they say YES, please I beg of you, send them to a different line to fill out their application.
- YOUR HUFFING ISN’T HELPING! Oh heavy sigher in line in front of me. If you couldn’t figure out there were going to be line-ups at the cash the last Saturday before Christmas you should have done your shopping earlier. All your sighing, foot tapping, and muttering under your breath is not going to get you to the front of the line any faster.
Now, what do you think would have happened if I’d let my inside thoughts fly out of my mouth the way I had really wanted to?? Merry Christmas indeed! Wishing you all a very Happy Holiday and if needed…the speediest of last minute shopping!
XOXO
Some people’s children, honestly! The mall by my house is huge, but there is NO WAY they built enough parking, and that parking lot would drive the best woman to drink. We had some icky inclement weather here in BC which kept many home yesterday – until later in the afternoon. By then, we had gotten most of our shopping done, and FLED.
Actually, my personal pet peeve is the one where people link arms, like 4 across, and just… meander sloooowly to their destination. it drives me BONKERS.
I hear you, I simply cannot stand shopping during this last week before Christmas, people are crazy….for the first time, this year I completed almost all of my shopping in November and it was a much better experience!
Yes this is certainly a crazy time of year & it’s so hard to have patience. The only encounters I’ve had so far are cashiers that are brand new, just being trained who are beyond slow & they don’t know how to put through visa gift cards.
I hate when they spend time asking you if you want to sign up for their credit card…if I wanted it I would already have it! Wastes so much time!
Oh too funny thanks for the morning laugh – “Deodorant is your friend”.
Wow, we are twins!
I detest shopping at any time of the year… Christmas is the worst! We are not done, but *I* am done. From this point on the hubby can finish what’s left.. I don’t even care anymore.
I got rammed w/a cart.. told a woman off for jerking her 3 year old…. had a woman block the aisle while talking on her f*cking cell phone…. then has the balls to give me a nasty look cause after waiting 3-4 mins i said “excuse me” and interrupted her call.
Oh .. 2 days ago I was out looking at coffee maker’s for my son. I happen to see the one I wanted for him… 2 ppl were standing literally right in front of it talking, not even looking at the shelf… I said ‘excuse me please”.. they didn’t miss a beat in their conversation… didn’t acknowledged I spoke.. said 4-5 more sentences and when I was about to ask again but much louder.. they slowly sauntered away.
I was mad. I still am.
For that reason.. I’m friggin’ done!
The huffing always gets to me – the people in front are not actually trying to keep us back. Really!
It sounds like it was a rough day for lots of people. Congratulations for not escalating the situations by being a jerk back. Everybody take a deep breath (myself included) and think happy Christmas thoughts.
People, man!!
Gah!
*smdh*
We went out on Sunday and were actually surprised at how quiet it was, no crowds at all anywhere we went. Hubby thought he would have fun people watching the madness and he was disappointed.
LOL you made me laugh! What a day! I haven’t entered a mall in about 5 weeks!
I try to do most of mine online. I only need groceries and chocolate from the actual store.
Not looking forward to shopping tomorrow but it’s gotta be done. Hopefully I’ll be strong enough not to yell obscenities in public…but there’s always that chance.
OMG you poor thing, what an experience. I hope that you managed to have a better rest of the day hun, happy holidays, Merry Christmas to you and your family
wow,what a shopping day the weather here has been storming for days and yesterday Mother nature decided we needed rain and today back to the snow storm….i have so much yet to get done