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How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

If Head Shaking Was An Olympic Sport….

in Everyday on 08/09/13

goldmedal

If head shaking was an Olympic Sport, this week I would win the Gold Medal in “Head Shaking”.  It seems I have picked up a nasty old women kind of habit.  I have turned into one hell of a head shaker.  It used to take a lot before I would get my “head shaking on”, but this past week, pft, every little thing set me waggling.

* The 14 year old boy smoking on the corner.  I shook my head.

*The dude texting while driving.  I shook my head and thought about shaking my old lady fist at him!

*At an unknown person who had picked up chicken at the Grocery Store and then apparently decided they didn’t want said chicken, so deposited it squarely in the cracker aisle.  Rude.  Head shakingly rude. 

*Still at the Grocery Store, the lady in front of me at the Express Check out.  Where the sign clearly states “8 items or less”, unloading her 14 items and whipping out her fistful of coupons.  Good grief I am that lucky.  (only a little head shake because she could see me and I am partially made up of aforementioned chicken)

*Fruit Flies. Yup, I totally shook my head at fruit fly’s, you know, because that will fix the fact that a banana seemingly went black overnight and spontaneous spawned 3000 bugs.  Gross. 

*The pool.  How does a  pool go so dirty overnight?   Worth a waggle.

*Chocolate on the carpet?  Shook my head at the kids who were not even in the room.

This is when I realized I may have a bit of a problem.  Life is not so bad; dumb teens, lazy people in the grocery store, fruit flies and messy kids are really not worth my time, my scorn or my head shake.  They are simply part of life in the Suburbs.  Going to breath deeper, laugh more and just let it go.  I know I can’t give up my head shaking cold turkey, but I think I will try and just “Silver” in this sport from now on.

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    Comments

    1. Anne Taylor says

      September 5, 2013 at 9:33 pm

      If I see someone texting in a car beside me, I make such as ass out of myself that they have to notice that I know what they are doing lol My husband disowns me while I “get their attention” I do shake my head though, at many things…probably the most common thing that gets my head shaking is that it seems I’m the only one in my family with the talent to put new toilet paper rolls on the thingamijig when there’s no toilet paper left. :[)

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