Look out world. Something horrible has happened, and it’s not that I’ve turned into my Mother. It’s that I’ve turned into my Mother but with the addition of mad sleuthing computer skills, a too quick temper, and the knowledge of some very bad words!
Over heard in my house this weekend:
“You live in Canada. It is snowing, You will wear that coat. If you don’t wear that coat, trust me when I tell you, I will know about it!” (go ahead and submit that one for parent of the year)
“I’m sorry you no longer LIKE your coat. If you have $200 dollars you can buy yourself a new coat, a better coat. If not, just wear the coat.”
“If you whine about that coat one more time this morning you can call your friends and do some whining to them because you will not be going to the dance! Any girl who has a tantrum is clearly not old enough to go to a dance.” (I wish I could tell you this was delivered in a cool and relaxed fashion like my Mom would have done, it was not.)
“I don’t care if all the other girls dress like that for the Friday night dances! You are 13, you will respect yourself and therefore that belly will be covered. Period” (fab negotiating, skills on my part right? Don’t worry it gets better)
“I appreciate you telling me lots of girls change into their “slutty” girl clothes when they get to the dance and you and your little group of friends do not. Point to you, how about throwing a long tank under that shirt” (See? She wins for honesty)
I have just one more thing I need to say. Sorry Mom. Sorry for every time I pushed your buttons, slammed the door, cried for no reason what so ever and sulked my way through a meal. If it makes you feel any better, I have two amazing daughters, and yet I can still tell you, payback is a bitch.
Oh yeah….it is a tough road to navigate and on occasion you have to pull out the big guns. OR on occasion you have to pull out the big guns ALL in one weekend. 🙂
You are doing a great job!!!
As a Mom to 2 daughters – I absolutely relate to this post.
Part of our jobs as parents – is to help guide them to make good choices (from fashion upwards).
Everything you said sounded perfectly sane to me, to be honest. 🙂
Well, you know we are definitely on the same page about this… you are an awesome mom, and the fact that she comes to you about anything, proves it. She knows that trust is there, and that is all that matters! 🙂
oh finally a reason to be glad I had all boys! lol you are doing great Mama! I cringe every time I see young girls dressing inappropriately, if I had girls you can bet the only time we would see their tummies outside the house would be at the beach…and even then..ah, see, so glad I don’t have to deal with pre teen girls lol hang in there!
I totally remember the day I looked at my mom and said, “I AM SO SORRY!” lol There’s been more than a few times that I’ve heard her words coming out of my mouth. 🙂
I have one daughter (& 3 boys) who is 12, she thinks she’s older but I have to remind her frequently that I still make the decisions on what she wears, what she listens to and who she considers her BFF’s. She is allowed to do a heck of a lot more than I ever was at that age so she should consider herself lucky I’m not 100% like my mom! 🙂
p.s. you’re a rocking awesome mom!
100% agree times 100 to your response to ‘anon’ {ya, like there’s such a thing, hahahha}.
While bearing your stomach, etc etc might be the ‘cool’ thing to do, it’s inappropriate in my house too. It’s not a matter of trust, it’s about decency!
In regards to the post, Stephanie, well said – I feel so bad for every dirty look I gave my Mom. I wish I could apologize.
And I just had that coat convo with my oldest this morning!
And now I’m distracted by anon’s stupidity.
Girls that young should NOT be wearing belly bearing shirts. It’s not age appropriate at all. It doesn’t have to do with trust- it has to do with teaching your daughter to respect her body. Kids this age don’t understand and if she’s showing off too much skin, boys and other girls WILL get the wrong idea.
Dear Anon
I’m so sorry you didn’t feel brave enough to leave your real name so we could have a civil conversation!
As I navigate through these tricky teen years I have nothing but pride, repsect and love for my daughter. I adore that we have a relationship strong enough that she is comfortable coming to me to discuss her horror that girls ages 12 and 13 are so obviously lying to their parents. Leaving their house in one outfit, changing in washrooms at the dance into clothes that SHE deems inapporpriate! Good for her. She respects herself enough to know baring it all is not a way to grab attention. I stand behind her 100%. In think most Mamas would.
If you are comfortable having your daughter out in the world in stomach baring outfits, then good for you. Those are not the rules in this house.