How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

I Am Not Winning Mama Of The Year

in Everyday on

Apparently I am the meanest Mama ever, I’ve been pushing my dear daughters buttons…

*I will not allow my children to do a little jig at the top of a slide.  Apparently they think there is zero possibility they will fall down from the top of the 7 foot slide and land head first on the cement that surrounds.  I’m pretty sure the odds are much higher.  Mean Mama says SIT.

*Candy.  It’s not for every day.  Harsh.

*Asked my dear daughter to have a shower and was met with stomping feet. 

*Make-up does not belong on the fresh beautiful faces of children under 13.  Apparently I live under a rock because “everyone else is wearing mascara and lipgloss Mom and they are only 12”. Sigh. Not ready.

*Homework.  Yep. it comes BEFORE play dates.

*I can be heard repeating at nauseam… “Elbows off the table.  Did you brush your hair?  Did you brush your teeth?  Please don’t leave your dishes in the TV room.  Pick your clothes up off the floor!  If these toys are still here ten minutes from now I am throwing them out!” I don’t like my voice when it gets all squeaky and naggy like that!!!

Distracted, frustrated Mama emerges….

Pretty sure I said yes to something? I don’t remember what the question was.  I wasn’t listening.

Forgot to fill out a field trip form. 

Shushed my daughter because I couldn’t hear a stranger on the phone.  Gee, who cares what some telemarketer has to say?

Told them “No dessert tonight”.  I really didn’t have a good reason.  Kids don’t need dessert every night?

Hoping they can find clean clothes to wear tomorrow because I was so busy today to do one stitch of laundry.

Today was that day.  Boo. 

I am not winning Mother of the year. 

    • Comments

    2. My first thought when I read the title was – uh yeah! Me neither!

      But actually I think you’re pretty inspiring that you never cease to scold them to pick up after themselves. Sometimes I let them win and bury myself under the clutter.

    3. My first thought when I read the title was – uh yeah! Me neither!

      But actually I think you’re pretty inspiring that you never cease to scold them to pick up after themselves. Sometimes I let them win and bury myself under the clutter.

    6. Sigh, you’ve given me a glimpse into the future. And the future says I will undoubtedly dislike myself, my kids, or both.

      Hang in there, I think you’re doing a fabulous job! You’re a role model for REAL moms.

    8. Welcome to the club!
      I was called mean recently when I would not let Cat (turned 9 in September) shave her legs. Told her she’s going to thank me for that one day.

    9. Ah, chin up. You’re doing great. Being Mom means saying no and setting up the boundaries. It’s not always fun. We’re working on thumb sucking over here and I think my little girl would nominate me for the meanest mom ever award for my contstant reminders to keep that thumb out. Talk about being a broken record. She’ll get here one of these days, right???

    10. Au contrair (not sure I spelled that right, my French is terrible!) you are doing a terrific job as a mother. You’re saying no and being firm when and where you need to be. And yes, you’ll yell and lose your temper at nothing sometimes, but it happens to all of us – trust me on that! Children get harder, it seems, the older they get, huh? Different challenges and worries and issues with each age. Sigh. It’s everything BUT easy!

    14. Wow, you are really something. And, that something would be awesome! I long for the days when almost every other mom was just like you, instead of like the other mom you described. 🙁

    15. Don’t worry — you’re not alone. I am right there with you. But the problem is, my Kiddo’s closest friends mom is the exact opposite. They can have all the candy they want, anytime (yet wondered why their 3-yr-old had a mouthful of cavities), Pringles ARE breakfast, showers and baths optional, and these LITTLE girls have make-up.

      And they think I am a square. Grr.