How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Her List vs His List. Men are Simple.

in Everyday on

Hubby and I were chatting late late into the night last evening.  We were counting ourselves among the lucky without too many wants for Christmas…ummm I mean besides the obvious complete home makeover and exotic tropical vacation for two.  In all seriousness.  The kids are alright.

So what do you get for the couple who already have all they desire?  Hubby thinks a “coupon book” is a good idea.  I can play this game!  My book would have coupons for a sleep in and breakfast in bed, one free vacuum with no bitching, a date night in front of the fire planned by him, a love letter written on PAPER and a back rub with no strings.  Done.

Now it’s his turn.  This my friends is where the wheels fall off.  In a mans world the coupon book looks something like this…. “Sex” “Sex” “Sex in this room” “Sex in that room” “You in my T-shirt” uhhh other things around sex that I am just not going to embarrass myself with by putting in print.  Huh?  Apparently 40 year old men really don’t need pretty ribbons and bows, thoughtful gestures and hugs, they just need to get it on?  For a man…nothing says Merry Christmas like sex.  Sigh.

Guess this is what is going on in the Suburbs.

FYI  Hubby is not getting a coupon book. 

I’m going to Wal-Mart. 

Happy Holidays!

 

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    • Comments

    3. I have to admit, I got lucky. My husband gives me a backrub every night. He wishes it would turn into a naked backrub, but he’s OK if it doesn’t. Sort of.

    5. That would so be LW!!! And that would be why I have never even attempted a coupon book. My list would be exactly like yours though.

      It’s nice to dream…..

      Happy Holidays!

    10. The last time I was in my husbands t-shirt I was 8months pregnant.
      Men are silly.
      PS. WalMart is insane. Protect the backs of your heels! I’ve lost all the skin on mine on Sunday afternoon after people ramming their carts into me!

    11. PMPL! This post makes me very happy! Your coupon book and mine are about the same and so are our husbands’. Looks like men and women are the same everywhere!

    12. Aww give him the sex coupon book but then create one for yourself that someone else “supposedly” gave you with “get out of sex free” coupons or even rain-checks. Or you could do a coupon with a disclosure at the bottom stating coupon not valid during PMS times, when retailer is tired, if the retailer is pissed off, Cannot be used on holidays, weeknights….you get the drift.

    14. You hit the nail on the head, girlfriend. They’re SO easy to please, it’s actually exhausting. Now go get yo Wal-Mart on.