I usually love Thanksgiving. If you are lucky, the weather is perfect, your kids behave, and you have a moment to reflect on what you are really thankful for. It’s an opportunity to bounce from house to house visiting with family while stuffing your face with turkey and indulging your sweet tooth. Perfection.
Reality. There is a little work that has to be done to get this “perfect” little family out the door.
My morning goes like this.
Get the girls in the shower.
Shake my head and start negotiation with the pre-teen. That is not the outfit I put out for her.
Remind both girls that they need to dry your hair BEFORE they put on their good clothes. Wet shirts. Not cute.
Start my list of complaints:
Who left the dog outside?
Did you feed the cat?
Can someone PLEASE help me with this salad?
No, you do not have time to play just one more computer game, and turn the TV off. Now.
No I don’t know where your other shoe is. How does a kid lose 1 shoe?
Seriously? Who ate my toasted pecans? They were for the salad.
No, you can not have pie now, it is for dessert.
I don’t know why we have pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving go and ask your Father…he is not doing anything.
Girls. I need to have a shower.
What…how is it that we have to leave in 20 minutes and I still have not figured out what to wear.
It is official I hate everything in my entire closet.
Please, please tell me my camera battery is charged.
Pack the purse..I can do make-up on the way.
Fix the girls hair.
Pack salad, dessert, camera, brush, sweaters, PJ’s, tylonel…what am I forgetting.
Crap. We need gas.
Finally get to the car.
Of course. Sweetgirl has to pee. Back in the house.
I have spent from 8am until 10:30am running around like a crazy person. Determined to set this family up for success. The goal. To arrive at the in-laws farm for our first of two Thanksgiving meals looking calm, cool and collected and ready to enjoy our day.
I am exhausted, but it’s fine because we look good and are ready to enjoy some family time even if it kills us!
Suddenly it dawns on me. What has the Hubby done this morning?
Said Good Morning. Tried talking me into sex.
Scratched. Tried talking me into sex.
Had a shower…asked me if I wanted to join him.
Checked his fantasy football stats.
Saw me running around like a crazy person..thought he’d ask if some “cuddling” time would help.
It’s official. Men can only think about 2 things.
Sex and Football. Sigh.
Hope all you Canadian’s had a fabulous Thanksgiving, managed to dodge your needy Hubby’s and arrived safe and sound at your family events. My American friends…I wish you luck next month!
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Apparently I’m sometimes funny.
lol.. great post dear!!!!
uuuggghh.. men, so would love to whop with a frying pan sometimes!!!
hope your thanksgiving is wonderful.. and from reading this post.. maybe i should start for ours next month.. like now!!!
Yes, football and sex. That pretty much sums it up. And can someone please tell me – why is it that they *think* cuddling might be a good idea when you are in the middle of insanity?
We boycotted Thanksgiving yesterday, and we are going to do it next month for American Thanksgiving when my parents are here to help with the new baby so that THEY can do all the work!
And the one good thing about being in so much pain from this pregnancy… my hubby knows WAY better than to proposition me for sex these days!
Bwahaha! Sounds like a morning at my house. My favorite is when he does one lousy thing without me having to pester him and feels like king shit. You did the dishes? Woop-di-freakin’ do! What do you want? A medal of honor?
This reminds me of the chaos Im going to bring upon myself next month!
Sex, football, and Batman. 🙂
Your husband sounds so much like mine! Oh and getting ready in the morning on any day sounds a lot like yours.
Loved this post – too funny and well, a little too true!!
Hope you have recovered nicely from your long wonderful day! 🙂
This convo sounds oh too familiar 🙂
i am not seeing a problem here…smiles.
My husband does the same thing, only he does it when I’m on the phone, or in a crucial part of a movie!
Not interested!
CBG
canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com
I soo can totally relate.
My sis and her fiance were here last weekend, and they were shocked at how long it took us to get ready and out the door!
Remind me again why we aren’t lesbian’s… Seriously I’m glad to know it really is all men. And children.
Stop…you just described my house! Last Sunday, I finally said to him, “You must have ass sores from all the football you’ve watched this weekend.” (That was after I quietly snuck upstairs to lay down for a moment and he appeared completely naked at the foot of my bed. C’mon!).
You’re right. It’s football and sex. Soon, it will be sex while watching football. I’m waiting for that one.
Happy Tuesday!
Brilliant post!!!
CJ xx