How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Even Hubby Doesn’t Know!

in Everyday on

I have been with my Hubby for a looooong time.  Married almost 14 years but I think I should get credit for the 5 years I put in before he wised up and put a rock on my finger.  So, let’s say 19 years and I must confess, there are some things, even my Hubby doesn’t know.

Dear Hubby has no idea I have one funky hair that grows out from my neck?  ewww I know right?  I have to pluck that baby every 6 months or so.  My sister and I have a pact then when we are old and grey, living side by side in some luxury old age home, we will drink wine together and make sure we face the world….without extra weirdo hairs.  She is my back up hair plucker if I can’t ever do it myself.  That is love.

Romantic Hubby doesn’t know that when I have had a really bad day and need a few minutes to myself, I will grab a book and go sit in the bathroom.  It may not be the most comfortable seat in the house, but sometimes it’s the only place a Sassy Mama in demand can catch 5 minutes to herself.

My Hubby shaves his face once a day.  Normal.  Yes, I shave my legs. Normal.  I also shave my big toe.  So not normal.  What can I say, hairy toes are not sexy and after you shave that stupid toe once, you can never stop!  Perhaps I should try waxing those babies??

Hubby has no idea that when I torture myself with a Biore facial strip. You know those little pieces of tape that tighten and clean out your pores.  So sexy!

IMG_4473I am secretly fascinated and disgusted at the same time by the zillion fuzzy little trees that are left behind after I rip it off my nose.  It is so gross and I can’t stop staring at it!  (Don’t worry I won’t over share and post that picture.)

Finally, Hubby knows I have a problem with examining my every twinge, ache and pain by investigating it to the fullest on the internet.  He has banned me, yes forbid me, from doing any medical searches on the computer.  Every time I google anything from a possible sprained toe to pink eye, I end up convincing myself I could possibly have some kind of incurable disease.  Poor boy is tired of talking me down.  What he doesn’t know, I can google from my phone and will sit in my car, in the bed, uh in the bathroom and do complete medical searches until I find a diagnosis I can live with.  Sigh.  I have a problem. 

Enough for now. Must go before he reads this over my shoulder.

Linky Love: Don’t miss the fabulous PiggyPaint Giveaway.

4 bottles of nailpolish & 1 remover.  Two winners!  US & Canada.  Ends Friday.

    • Comments

    1. He doesn’t read here? hehehe as for the toe. while standing in the line at Wallyworld, I happened to glance at the “buy me because you absolutely need me” items and they ahd a tiny as seen on tv (I don’t have tv still) electric (maybe it takes batteries, I didn’t dare pick it up because someone would see me looking at it) shaver tiny enough for doing toe hair in one swipe? also under chins I guess. I wonder where else that baby would go?

    3. The first time one of my kids saw me with one of those biore strips on my nose, the look on the face was priceless! Yes, somethings need to stay private.

    5. DO NOT wax your big toe. OMG… DO NOT DO IT!!
      Talk about the most painful thing you could ever possibly imagine. I’ve waxed my little girl (self wax – NOT the was at the salon… there’s a blog about that one) and that hurt horribly… but waxing the toe?
      I’d rather sleep with my ex husband.
      and really, that’s something that makes me want to vomit.

    7. Amusing post Modern Mom! I do the same, the whole toe thing, biore thing, waxing the upper lip, its just some things men aren’t meant to know haha!! and good for you by taking off to the bathroom and taking time for your self…I do that alot too – espesically at work haha!

      S.

    9. I am a toe shaver. Thinking that we are pretty normal considering the comments. 🙂 I also am intrigued by the biore strips – so much so that even I show my Boo! He’s just not as impressed 😛

      I think maybe men should know a little of what we do to look as good as we do.

    11. So funny! Yup, there are some things they just don’t need to know!
      I do the computer look up of maladies too…not a good idea! Enjoy that quiet time in the bathroom with a good book (I have done that before too!)

    14. I was plucking my new friends, the dark facial hairs, last night and my husband walked in. “What are you doing?” he asked.

      “I’m plucking this hair on my cheek. Would you rather I just leave it there?”

      He left me alone after that. I have one on my chin too.