How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Everybody Does It

in Everyday on


I simply can’t be the only one. Don’t you…

Taste the milk and think it’s a wee bit off, you know, it stinks like sour! So you go and ask your significant other to give it a try. Honey drink this stink. Is it sour?

I can’t be the only one to use the ol “Oh the Kids are so tired, I think we better be going…” to escape the family function that has gone on 2 hours toooo long.

Someone besides me must have hoped for rain so your Hubby’s golf game will be cancelled, or at least cut short.

I’m sure I’m not the only Mom, short on time and out of ideas, who has thrown a wiener into a bowl of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese and called it a balanced meal.

I may be the only fool who buys light popcorn and then smoother’s it in extra butter. mmmm. Hey, the lady in front of me at the McDonald’s Drive-thru today got the biggie fries and a Diet Coke. Same difference.

Of course this doesn’t make me feel better about the fact that I spent 45 minutes on the treadmill and then celebrated with a chocolate bar. Sigh.

I am SURE I am not the only wasteful human to simply discard a funkified container of Tupperware full of mystery meat instead of doing the responsible thing and oh I don’t know, washing it!

Ever turned a sock over to hide a hole? Nope, me either.

This is what passes for normal here in the Suburbs. At least I hope it does.
I’m pretty sure everybody does it.

    • Comments

    2. Hubby and I were thrilled when we had our kids and we were FINALLY able to use the old “it’s getting late and the kids are getting tired” excuse! Love that one!

    3. Oh, I do the tupperware thing all the time. Thank goodness for the new disposables! Makes my laziness so much less expensive.

      I reward myself with potato chips, not chocolate, but yeah. Guilty!

      Too fun to read!

    5. Both the hubs and I are guilty of tossing mystery leftovers in whatever container is unlucky enough to be storing them. My Mom, otherwise known as Mrs. Cleaver, is horrified by this. That’s why the hubs is my soulmate. We’re on the same page with being ridiculously wasteful. Ah ha

    8. You’re not alone. 🙂

      Okay, I’ve never thrown away a perfectly good pair of poopie underpants (my kid’s, of course!) because I couldn’t bear the thought of throwing that in the wash!

      Great post.

    14. I plead the fifth for all of the above. I swear, though, that I haven’t done them. Much. at least not all in a day. Nor have I said “whatever” when my son said just wanted fig newtons for dinner. It had fiber in it right?