What I didn’t know…

Yes, Hello, Bonjour!  I’m still in Paris!  Here is a Guest Post (my very first guest poster ever!!) from the incredibly sweet and fabulous Courtney of The Mommy Matters.  Don’t follow her?  You should!

I have to admit, when I became a mother I was completely and totally ill-prepared for the job that was ahead of me. I’d read all of the What to Expect books, joined tons and tons of online “parenting” forums, and had sought advice from every wise and knowing mother who had come before me. But in the weeks that followed my son’s birth and our transition from the hospital to our home, I discovered that I was totally and completely clueless.

No one told me when I was pregnant, that for the first several post-partum months, I would find under-eye concealer as essential as breathing. They also failed to mention that if I wanted the stuff to do its job and hide the fact that I was completely sleep-deprived, I would need to lose the spit-up covered Yoga Pants and opt for something…clean.

Remember having that thought while you were still pregnant that six weeks seemed like an eternity to go without sex? After that baby is delivered, I promise you sex is the last thing on your mind. And that “six week appointment” you thought you’d be looking forward to? You know, the one where they give you the “go ahead” to have sex again? You’ll most likely be trying to reschedule that bad baby and move it to a later date. And if you can’t, you’ll be amazed at what kind of excuses you can come up with not to hop in the sack with your man again. Because the idea of spending even 15 minutes of “free time” doing something other than sleeping, seems absolutely absurd.

Remember those really cute, low rise skinny jeans you used to rock prior to mommy-hood? Yeah. You might as well rid your closet space of those. Even if you get back down to your pre-preggo weight, the likelihood that you’ll be able to squeeze everything that has been “misplaced” back in those jeans, is slim-to-none. Because people forget to tell you that after delivering a baby, things move and weight isn’t about the number anymore. It’s about finding room to put that new-found “junk in the trunk” and figuring out how to contort your body so you can squeeze those baby-mama hips into a pair of normal jeans again.

Starting to feel like you were short-handed? Feeling like those pregnancy books ripped you off and failed to share the realities of motherhood with you? Don’t. Because despite your new concealer addicted, sex-averting mentality, motherhood really is joyous. The sleep deprivation fades, you get eventually start to look at your husband like he’s a good guy again (instead of the evil sperm-giver who got you in this situation in the first place) and you start to realize that motherhood is the most exciting roller-coaster of emotions and happiness that you’ve ever been on.

Thanks so much to Modern Mom for giving me the opportunity to Guest Post!


  1. I can empathize, having lived the whole experience — and relived it — four times, way back when. Motherhood is indeed joyous, and over the years, it changes according to the attitudes of the people in the family unit. And it is always something you’ll cherish. Congrats on joining the mommyhood.

  2. I love this post! So completely how I felt after having my daughter 2 years ago and once again doing it again. My poor hubby is counting down to when we can have sex again,I don’t have the heart to tell him it ain’t happening for awhile yet!

  3. LOL! Your killing me! So many things I wish I would have known before grant. Most of which you pretty much took care of in your post! Motherhood is so wonderful but so consuming and your life is never the same- but in a good way!

    Have a $200 modern bird giveaway today on my blog! check it out and win a print of your family- you know the ones that took your skinny jeans from you! LOL!

  4. Lol so love this post! How great it that!

  5. Motherhood really is joyous and we can learn about the realities that parenting books left out from reading blogs.

  6. Weight is so much more than just a number after having a baby!

  7. Great post! It all seems so hard those first three months or so, but before you know it baby is sitting up and then rolling around and you see their personality develop and all is good.

    And eventually you *can* wear jeans that don’t have an elastic waistband. 🙂 They just might not be the same size they used to be.

  8. smiles. i appreciate this having two boys of my own and walking through it with my wife…having kids is a big change for men too, i had my struggles certainly…

  9. Yes, that about sums it up! I felt all those things!

  10. I can totally understand wanting to pass up sex for sleep. There isn’t much I wouldn’t give up for sleep NOW, and I get plenty of it. Still, I cannot wait to have this baby.

  11. So this is what I have to look forward to when I have my first baby in about 6 weeks!? Haha, I know it will all be worth it, though. 🙂 Great guest post!

  12. Hi – I am asking for fellow bloggers to visit my site in hopes that we can find a match for a young girl that desperately needs a bone marrow transplant. Would be great if you could visit today too. Thank you. Kelly
    I’ve Become My Mother
    I’ve Become My Mother facebook

  13. hi Modern Mom, how’s Paris so far?

    Courtney, you are so right esp in that sex thing! Great job in writing this entry.

  14. Oh yes… I didnt even know what concealer was until I had my first son!

  15. In France you can have sex two DAYS after you give birth if you feel like it. However you cannot attempt a sit-up without having first performed the perineum reeducation program.

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