How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Next Holiday I Want To Be The Dad

in Everyday on

EasterEggsA Dad’s Role at Easter:

-Participate in Easter Egg Hunt activities

-Shower for dinner

-Get dressed

-Nap?

-Show up for dinner

That is all.

Mom’s Role at Easter:

-Weeks before Easter co-ordinate with sister, Mother, Mother In Law, Sister In Law, possibly cousins. Find dates that will work for a minimum of two Easter celebrations.  Dates must not conflict with extra curricular activities of the six cousins or with any other family member schedules.

-Minimum of two weeks out start picking up “little things” for Easter from treats to socks to menu necessities.

-Create menu plan for meal you are hosting or dishes you are taking to multiple Easter feasts. 

-Take children shopping for appropriate Easter outfits.

-Forgot to buy shoes.  Go shopping again.  Pre-teen will be all kinds of thrilled about this.  Sigh. 

-Week of Easter brave WalMart along with thousands of other last minute Mom’s to stock up on Easter Egg Hunt supplies and baskets.  Suffer sticker shock at price of baskets stuffed with sad looking floppy eared bunnies and eggs that should be embarrassed to try and pass themselves off as chocolate.

-Create your own beautiful but pricy basket of joy and then give that damn bunny all the credit for delivering the perfect Easter morning. 

Easter dinner is two hours away.  Force the kinds into the shower and re-live the same argument that drying one’s hair after the shower is truly part of the “having a shower experience”.  (every single time!)

-Present Easter outfit number one for dinner number one.

-Go to get dressed yourself.  Realize you forgot yourself in the Easter Clothes shop of 2011.  Try on six pairs of pants before you find one pair that is acceptable. Destroy closet in the process….another mess for later.

Check on girls. They have both altered their outfits to make them more “comfortable”.  Decide to Let. It. Go.

Have they brushed their teeth? No.

Have they brushed their hair? No.

Are they wearing clean socks, any socks? No!  Of course not, they can’t find socks. Ever.

Have an internal scream and go in search of back up.  Where is Hubby? 

Napping.

Deep breath.

Count my blessings.

Next year, playing the role of Daddy, will be me.

 

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    • Comments

    1. I agree I’d want to be the dad too. It’s funny how it traditionally women are always the one to do everything which sucks ! Women everywhere should plan a strike

    3. My youngest will be 11 in a few days, but I’m still past the Easter routine. Guess I’ve cheated child number 3 out of her last year of bunnies, baskets, etc.

      But, did it all, too. Except the dinner; the husband is our Sunday cook.

      Why do we love holidays? Or do we? LOL

    4. NO KIDDING! That sounds like every dad I know 🙂

      and I stumbled your blog today…now that I know about stumble, I figured I should stumble my favorites so others can find them.

    9. Do what my mom did one year. She pretended to forget about it. Then when my sister and I got upset, she left the house and my father had to deal with us. When he confronted her (she was gone for 5 hours)she said she was going to forget all the holidays because she was EXHAUSTED FROM ALL THE PLANNING.

      He helped her on every subsequent holiday.

    10. I recommend moving. Since we moved to Van we have no family obligations at holiday time. It’s completely stress free in comparison because I don’t care less if they have socks on:)

    12. hmm, maybe i’ll tell my hubby, too.
      even if it’s not easter, it’s good to make husbands “housebands”…