Theme Park Parenting Fails

I’m back!  We are tired and happy. Back to the real world of carpool and homework, laundry and “What’s for dinner?”  So much to do, so much to tell.  Where to start?  With my thoughts on some shocking parenting behaviour!

I know taking your beloved babes to the Theme Parks of Orlando Florida can prove to be stressful.  What with the crowds and all the “I want ice creams”, “I’m tireds”,“I want on THAT ride now” “Get me off this scary ride now” and general whining going on.  Here is the thing.  We are the parents.  We are the ones who are expected to step up, grab a map, create a plan of action, have snacks on hand for the “hungrys” that attack.  Figure out when to say “No” and when to cave to the demands of our wee folk.  We may also need to dig deep if this memory making day hits a few bumps!  Tap those reserves of patience and kindness, find what is needed to get our babies through the stressful, exciting, emotional roller coaster of a day that is the Theme Park experience.

Above all, we must avoid these parenting fails that made me shake my head and chomp on my tongue to keep quiet on my foray through the Theme Parks this week:

When your two year old toddler falls down in her bathing suit and scrapes both of her knees and cuts her palms.  Your reaction should never be “Of course it’s gonna hurt you cry baby.”   Are you kidding me?  Perhaps take her off her way short leash, then she would not trip every time you raise your arm to point at something new!  Parent fail!

Seventeen? year old Mama in ripped up cut offs and tank top super preggers with baby number two and constantly readjusting your hair, pulling down your shorts to umm cover your cheeks and checking your makeup, not that I am judging, you self involved tart.  An 8 month old baby gets NO nutritional value from that Orange Crush Soda you just poured in her bottle!  Parent fail.

Sir, your little boy is clearly exhausted and terrified of Shrek in 4-D. 

Shrek is a big boy!  In this Momma’s humble opinion, telling him to “Suck it Up”.  Not Okay.  Ever. Parent fail.

…and the timeless classic seen in every theme park in the Orlando area…

Wheel chair fakers.  You know, the family that pretends they are in need of a wheel chair, so they go sign one out?  Now they can cut to the front of every line.  News flash, we are on to you!  It is a dead giveaway when your kid is utilizing the wheelchair as you approach the Superman ride but when we see you again at the Hulk rollercoaster Mom is taking a turn! 

What exactly do you think you are teaching your impressionable young children?  Spiderman would be disappointed with you.  Parent fail.

I would never pretend I am perfect, in fact my kids faces may hurt from being repeatedly asked to smile for the camera for the past two weeks, but I also know I did my job!!  Those smiling exhausted kids tucked snug in their beds tonight are happy and content, we all enjoyed ourselves and my two girls did not suffer any major Parent Fails.  Can’t wait until next year!