Tiny Flying Vampires

It was two days before Christmas, when I heard a persistent, one might even say agonized “scratching” in the wall, right next to the fireplace.  Hubby convinced me it was just a wee mouse, at worst some poor lost baby squirrel trying desperately to stay warm in the coldest weather South-Western Ontario has seen in 20 years.  I’m gullible, really wanted this to be true, so  I chose to believe that not only was it just one we rodent type creature inside that wall, but that there was no possible way said creature could ever get out of that wall and into my home. I. Was. Wrong.

Then just two days ago, I left the house to take my girls to the chiropractor.  My Dear Hubby was a little too anxious to rush us out the door?  To have us call on the way home.  Huh?  WHY?  Ohhh maybe he was going to surprise us with a nice lunch, or perhaps just start a fresh pot of coffee and hot chocolate for the girls?  I could not have been more wrong.  What I would later learn, SassyHubby was trying to usher us all out of the front of the house so we would not be exposed to the horror that was flapping around in my kitchen.  A mere 15 feet away, my little white cat had a BAT cornered in the blinds.  What the hell!  This was no happening AGAIN.

Bat

After I was scooted out of my home, Hubby caught the bat and unceremoniously tossed that ugly creature out into the snow.  Don’t even start with me if you think this was cruel.  When it comes to bat vs. man; bat has to go!  Those things are KNOWN to carry rabies and should not be flying around at this time of year!  Especially INSIDE a house!  If you have a bat in your house in the dead of winter you need to be hitting the panic button, something is very wrong with that creature.  

I came home from the chiropractor, a little disappointed that there was no surprise lunch waiting for me, and none the wiser that SassyHubby had just gone one on one with a bat using nothing but a giant Tupperware lid.  When out of ear shot of the kids SassyHubby confessed what he had been up to that morning.  Fighting a tiny vampire!  I might have freaked out a bit.  First there was denial,. No, this could not be true!  Then anger. Why?  Why was this happening again, we already had our turn with flying rodents the night we fought the bats with a beach blanket!  Then finally acceptance.  Time to make a plan to survive the evil little vampires trying to move into my home!  

As this is the second time in three years we have had a bat in the house, I had a horror movie playing in my head.  That scratching I had heard?  There were dozens of bats fighting to get into my house weren’t there????  Were there thousands of these vampire like creatures laying in wait to come out under the darkness of night and attack my children, drink their blood and get all tangled in our hair?  This is when hysterical Mama kicked in.  I ordered an exterminator be found immediately.  I didn’t care if it cost extra after hours!! I announced I would not stay in a house with bats, and started making a list of options for accommodation for myself and the children until our home was declared bat free!

Patient Hubby, not phased by one wee bat nor by my over the top reaction, called an exterminator who arrived pronto.  (and FYI apparently my reaction to bats in the house, totally normal!)  This hero in steel toe boots went climbing through our attic, dug through our walls and inspected our fireplace.  He found….some mice.  Yuck and yeah?  Yup, apparently quite common and not a big deal?  Are there more bats anywhere up there?  Maybe, but probably not.  Exterminator Man’s story:  He figures that bat was sleeping away the winter in the relative warmth of our walls.  When the temperature took a huge dip, bat shifted, bat fell, and all disoriented and sleepy accidently ended up in our house instead of outside.  Shiver.  Turns out what we had was one stupid bat.  To reiterate; Exterminator Man assured me we do not have a bat problem, he doesn’t think we will see anymore flying fellows anytime soon.  This was not a rabid flying bat, just a dumb one. However, just to be sure, he will be back to double check in the spring.  The spring?  There are 67 more sleeps until the spring!

I can’t walk into a closet, dark room or the kitchen without looking for tiny flying vampires.  Every time the cat scratches I jump three feet in the air.  The kids knock the chandelier in the front hall and I nearly pee my pants.  Sleep?  Sleep is impossible because that is when the bats come out!  I have a case of Post Traumatic Stress Bat Disorder, and now there is one more reason I hate winter.  Anyone want to put us up until the spring?  I can bring my cat!

Phineas1



Comments

  1. 🙂 Your Sassy Hubby was great to get you out of the house to deal with the vampire!

  2. Eeeeeeeeeek!!! Kudos to Sassy Hubs for chasing you all out of the house to not have to witness the removal. I am shuddering for you…..

    Granted this is coming from the girl who screams like a banshee while spraying bug spray willy-nilly when a spider is spotted….sooooo maybe not the toughest cookie 🙂

    Keeping my fingers crossed the exterminator is correct!

    • I am still shuddering from that stupid bat removal. (so not a bug killer either) I really can’t imagine what I would have done if he hadn’t been here!

  3. Oh gosh–hang in there. The Mrs. tells a story of when she was in college and discovered a bat flying in her apartment about midnight. She got into her car drove 2 hours to her parents home and called her building’s maintenance man from there. She would not return until the man assured her that the bats were gone.

    Oh those creepy crawlies.

    • LOL I had to laugh out loud when I read your comment. I completely understand the instinct to get in the car and just drive away. Thank goodness my Hubby was home to chase down that little bat. My parents are in Florida right now, that is one heck of a drive!

  4. Judy C (Judy Cowan) says:

    Yay to sassy hubby dealing with the bat, but Nay to the bat – I hate them!!! Really hope no more decide to enter your home, I have only ever had to deal with a bat inside once and that was enough!

    • Once you have had a bat in your house you simply never forget it! So sorry to hear you’ve had those evil critters in your house too! Shiver.

  5. Gah! #heebiejeebies

  6. courtney b says:

    OMG eeck !:) so gross! i thought we had it bad when we had bed bugs! actually, it’s probably about a tie

  7. Melinda L. says:

    Oh my goodness. You have quite the bat visitors! I just read your post from 2009 and omg I totally agree with your actions to get that bat out of the house in both cases!! Let’s hope the exterminator is right and there’s no more bats.

  8. OMG! They scare the crap out of me. We had a bat in our cabin two years ago in Mammoth Lakes and yes he was beaten to death!!!

  9. Yikes those are kinda scary!!!

  10. Gah, I would have freaked too, and I am not the freak out kind. We had scratching in our walls and it was mice, and a bee hive. Luckily no bats.
    Good luck.

    • Okay the bee hive in your walls had to be kind of scary too!! (then again, I am the freak out kind) Hope all is well now!

  11. Cheryl Grandy says:

    I’ve never had a bat in the house but we did have scratching in the walls of the first home we rented. My husband thought it might be a rat. I’m from Alberta where we have no rats, so was quite out of my league thinking of rats in my Nova Scotia home. It turned out to be a much smaller rodent ( didn’t look closely but I think it was a mole) which we caught in a trap in my closet.

    • Eek!! Okay a mole sounds much better then a rat and is certainly better then a bat, but what are these creatures doing getting into our homes!! So glad you survived your scare with one of Mother Natures crazy creatures.

  12. All I can say is “yuck”. Thank Goodness for brave exterminators!

    • I am so thankful there are people in this world who enjoy that kind of work! I never thought I would be so happy to see an exterminator walk through my front door. Yuck is right!

  13. Smart move by hubby by getting you and the kids to leave before taking care of business!

  14. But the bat did lead to an excellent story! 🙂

  15. Lynda Cook says:

    I don’t like bats either, terrified of them, but reading your story brought a chuckle and a smile, your a great writer and love reading your blogs keep up the good work….and hopefully the exterminator is right and no more bats!!!

    • Stephanie says:

      Thank you Lynda, that is very sweet of you to say!
      Now as to that exterminator, he had better be right or I will have to move! I can’t exist in a house with bats!

  16. Christine Topley says:

    I took a video of the bat that was in our house and it’s removal. Not comical at the time but I laugh now when I watch it. Called it “The Great Bat Caper” LOL

    • Stephanie says:

      I LOVE that you took a video of your bat removal. Eek, I almost cried just hearing about that creature in our home, I know I couldn’t have video taped the drama! You are a very brave woman!

      • Christine Topley says:

        I wouldn’t say brave especially when I had to TRY and keep my composure as the hubby was scaring me with it as I was taking the video. Let’s just say that if he ever went missing they’d come to me first and ask what I did with him LOL

  17. Victoria Ess says:

    OMG you poor thing! I would not be able to stand the idea of sharing a house with a bat!! Here’s hoping the exterminator was right and that there are no more in your house!

    • Stephanie says:

      I am determined t think positive (or never sleep again) There are no more bats in this house. oh please let this be true!

  18. Betsy Barnes says:

    We’ve had bats in our old house, it was horrible! They had a nest in the attic, so I called the pest control. Turns out, there’s nothing could be done, bats are protected in our state, plus, the eat bugs and spiders. Still, it always was creepy knowing they had set up home in my home! 🙂

    • Stephanie says:

      Nothing that could be done! That is what nightmares are made of! (for a chicken like me LOL)Were those bats getting into your house! EEK!

  19. Richard Hicks says:

    This would have scared me! They can be very bad pests that only exterminators can get rid of

  20. ok seriously creeped out now!!

  21. I’ve not had to deal with a bat in the house. One crazy bat flew into the picture window and knocked itself out. My father took care of it. (didn’t want details)

  22. I can’t imagine the horror of a bat in the house!!! My skin is crawling thinking about it…..Yes, you can join us. Please bring that gorgeous cat with you too! 😉
    XO

    • Stephanie says:

      LOL Packing my bags and my cat. Bats do not belong INSIDE of houses. But wait, don’t you have snakes? 🙂

  23. Kristine Ewald says:

    Scary

  24. I take it you don’t want a bat house for the backyard then?

    • Stephanie says:

      Oh my gosh, no thank you!! Do you have a bat house!
      Now don’t get me wrong, I have seen bats in the summer time, in the BACK YARD. The problem, bats are not meant to be IN the house 🙂 #Shiver

  25. That’s unpleasant! I’m more concerned about mice and rats, they are really dangerous, they bite and cary a lot more nasty things. Bats on the other hand don’t really want to be around humans that much. Yes they can settle in a house, but unless by accident they will not enter inside. Rats will 🙁 Sorry to hear you had this creature in your house.

  26. OMG I would have lost it. Your lucky was home and you didn’t have to deal with the bat on your own 🙂

  27. Good kitty you have! Cats are awesome for finding unwanted critters in homes. I have two kitties and I know every time even a fly gets into our home because they both go tearing after it until one of them eventually gets it. I don’t know what I would have done with a bat in my home. I definitely would have called my two cats to help out unless they had spotted him before me, which is probably what would have been the case. 🙂

  28. My husband also keeps things like this from me whenever he can because he knows I will be panicing and anxiety ridden and won’t be able to sleep but I hate the thought that something like that could be living in my house and I don’t even know it!

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  1. […] get warm, and I started the beginning of my week by inviting an exterminator into my home to do battle with a bat.  Shiver.  My alarm didn’t go off yesterday, I’m pretty sure I pulled a muscle in my […]

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