On Stealing Chocolate, Swearing and Peeing…a little.

If confession is good for the soul, this week I will be all good!  Here my friends, are this week’s confessions from the suburbs:

*Today I stole the last full sized chocolate bar out of my daughter’s Halloween bag.  Calm down, I will replace it.  It wasn’t even a good chocolate bar, it was a Coffee Crisp and I ate the damn thing in about 60 seconds. 

ChocolateBar

*I flat ironed my hair this week. In itself, not unusual.  What I did that was off the wall?  Instead of using heat protector on my hair, I sprayed my hair with some A535 type substance.  I smelled like a 90 year old woman for three days. 

*I swore in front of my daughter, loudly.  Then tried to distract her from my slip of the tongue by lecturing her on the evils of mean women who make up stories and gossip.  It didn’t work, she just thought it was cool that I cursed, loudly.

*I fed my kids Pizza for dinner.  Twice in the same week.  I’m such a good Mother.

*I sneezed.  (this is not the confession)  I had to stop walking and cross my legs when I did.  Yup.  It’s been more than 12 years since I carried a babe around in my still giant belly and I still cannot sneeze with confidence.  Pathetic.  Those nearly 9lb babies ruined my lady bits. 

*I sent an e-mail with pictures attached to myself.  When 6 seconds later, my phone “beeped”, I excitedly checked my e-mail to see what had arrived in my inbox.  Idiot, it was the e-mail I had just sent to myself.  Blonde much?  Guess so!

Honesty, it’s good for the soul! Feel free to try it with some confessions of your own, or at least tell me mine aren’t that bad!



Comments

  1. I curse loudly in front of my kids all the time. I was raised in a Navy family and there is a reason they say “curse like a sailor.”

  2. I too cursed in front of my children….once! And they still talk about it!!! (lol)

  3. In my book, no confession is needed for stealing candy from you children or feeding them pizza twice in a week. The two balances out everything. 🙂

  4. LOL at the email to yourself! Pizza is a well rounded meal…..sorry about the sneeze.

  5. We all have THOSE weeks 🙂 I once walked around at work for 7 hours without realizing my pants were on backwards. Scrub pants, but still. You would have thought the fact I was annoyed the pockets were in a strange place and how had I not noticed this before would have tipped me off… nope 🙂

    We can’t always be on our A game 🙂

    • LOL!!!
      I haven’t done that – yet ;-), but my mom did it a few times – pants backwards, unzipped skirt, different shoes in different hight, shirt inside out. It’s in the family, so sooner or later it will happened to me too. The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree, right.

  6. Anne Taylor says:

    We all have those weeks! Thank goodness my grandkids took all of their candy to their homes, so I didn’t have any temptation. My kids used to get so mad at me for eating their candy while they were at school lol

  7. Judy C (Cowan) says:

    Yep, sounds like one of those week! Full sized chocolate bar in the Halloween Candy…wow lucky kids (or should I say Mom who inhaled it!). Pizza twice in a week, been there done that! Here’s hoping this week is better……you should soon be packing shouldn’t you?

  8. I accidentally email myself ALL the time. It’s what I do best apparently.

  9. You make me laugh, thank you for being you and being brave enough to say what we all do! 🙂

  10. Ha! I do the same email thing all. the. time. And I’m not blond at all! lol

  11. LOL!!! I’m bad I took the whole bag after Halloween 😉 (that’s what good parents do, eat all the bad stuff, right).

    Sneezing – same story, running even worse, I guess that’s why I don’t exercise 😉
    E-mailing to myself – all the time.

    I love your confessions, keep them coming. 😀

  12. These were awesome!!! BTW pizza? bread/grain, check, veg? check, meat? well almost check, and cheese for dairy. MOM! it up! 🙂

  13. Also pizza is like our life with potatoes as children? I do not enjoy potatoes now, so maybe our kids will not enjoy pizza as much during our grandkids years?

  14. Confessions from me:
    Apparently, I taught my son that when someone is in trouble, you say “now you listen here pal.” He went to school and said that to his teacher when he wasn’t happy to have to come inside already.
    My children threw my mountain of laundry that was clean and just needed folding on the floor… and I just left it there and played in it with them like piles of leaves.
    I just got gas and bought a chocolate bar while there because after reading this I really “needed” one and could either buy myself one or eat 4… gotta take equally from all the kids. The confession part- I checked their bags to see if they each had one I liked first!
    Love your confessions, you never fail to brighten my day 🙂

  15. Judy C (Cowan) says:

    Might have to confess…..store my hubby’s chocolate bar out of the freezer today…maybe he won’t notice it is gone 🙂

  16. I broke down hysterically in front of my daughter over work stress. I let her believe Mommy hurt herself instead of trying to explain. Sigh. We all have our moments as parents :)!

  17. I didn’t read one thing here that was confession-worthy. 😉 I think we’ve all been there, done that.

    Well, at least I have. =)

  18. All those pee stories makes me grateful for my C-Sections! Pizza twice in a week is nothing to confess….at least you fed them twice that week. I’ve seen worse. Normally, I’ve finished most of the candy from their Halloween bags by now. This year, I believe I’ve only shoplifted one lousy piece. Being on a diet is no fun at holiday times. Being 22 lbs. lighter – priceless! 🙂

  19. Confession is good and you are normal, thanks for joining the rest of us!

  20. Victoria Ess says:

    Oh my gosh, was your hair okay (besides the smell lol)? I can’t think of any confessions at the moment but will post another comment if one comes to mind.

  21. Wow, your daughter got full sized chocolate bars, my children didn’t, just those little piddly things that I had to take 4 of to make up half a full size one. Didn’t cut it!

    • Yes, the full size chocolate bar seemed to be a big giveaway this year! She was so spoiled and I was so stealing them 🙂

  22. joanna garcia says:

    we all have those slip ups just prove we are human no matter how hard we try to be perfect!

  23. Teresa Honores says:

    lol omg me too with my almost 9 lb baby i hate when that happens! LOL have a great Thanksgiving!

  24. loucheryl says:

    I emailed a photo of a kids to myself today. I meant to send it to my BFF but nope. Oops!

  25. kathy downey says:

    haha,i almost peed myself just reading this post…oh the things we do