Dance season is almost over. Almost. Just one more week of classes, two more recitals, one big year end banquet and then……auditions for placement on next years competitive team. Sigh. The end of the year is in sight! As I sat in the dressing room this past weekend, helping my dear daughter get through pictures; changing from Ballet, to Acro, to Jazz to what’s next? Touching up make-up and adjusting hair I felt…..tired.
I’m not the dancer, I’m not the competitor, just the writer of cheques, the organizer, the taker of pictures and the chauffer. So why was I the one feeling burnt out and then so guilty about feeling burnt out? It didn’t matter, I am the Mom, put the kids first and no matter what never ever admit you are tired. Bottle it up baby. Put that smile on your face and pretend like everything is fine. That’s what we do in the Suburbs, right?
Then sitting in that dressing room I saw something, something new. It was a crack. A Mama, sitting next to me sighing at her Blackberry, looking just about as tired as I felt. Was someone else feeling this crazy ass Dance Mom Fatigue? A look around the room revealed, not all was well with the Dance Moms. There were some Mama’s shaking their heads, some rubbing their foreheads, and was that a tear? I decided to go for it; I opened a can of worms.
I simply declared; “I am not the best Mama I can be on Dance Competition days.” Nods started immediately. That’s all it took!! The Dance Mamas let loose;
“So much pressure to have everything right.”
“This morning I could NOT find one headpiece. One feather. I tore my house apart trying to find one teeny little piece of costume! It will take me hours to clean up the mess I made.”
“It’s stressful to get all the ducks in a row, have the million pieces of costumes ready, the make-up organized, the hair right!”
“Oh and to get to competitions on time, to not get lost, to find parking and keep these babies calm. I stress, they stress, I sweat, we yell…it’s not good.”
“I am EXHAUSTED.”
Revelation: I am not alone, the Dance Mama’s of the Suburbs are freak in tired by the end of the season and our wants, our biggest hearts desires? They are simple;
Some help from the Hubby’s getting the little’s organized for the day.
An understanding that this Toddler’s and Tiara’s Hair and Make-Up does not happen on it’s own. If you can’t help, then stay the hell out of the way.
Perhaps some assistance making hotel arrangements or printing directions for your directionally challenged wife when she is headed out of town. (clearly this one is all me)
Provide a cheering section for your little dancer. (and maybe your Wife)
Maybe make a little dinner.
When we are away at a three day event, tidy the house up a bit while we are playing chauffer, manager and cheering squad.
When we come back allow us a place to hide (away from the kids we love the most) for a few minutes to unwind. Just a bath, by ourselves? That would be awesome.
…or maybe what we really need is something more straight forward, a Sister Wife?