Dance Mom Fatigue

Dance season is almost over.  Almost.  Just one more week of classes, two more recitals, one big year end banquet and then……auditions for placement on next years competitive team.   Sigh.  The end of the year is in sight!  As I sat in the dressing room this past weekend, helping my dear daughter get through pictures; changing from Ballet, to Acro, to Jazz to what’s next?  Touching up make-up and adjusting hair I felt…..tired. 


I’m not the dancer, I’m not the competitor, just the writer of cheques, the organizer, the taker of pictures and the chauffer.  So why was I the one feeling burnt out and then so guilty about feeling burnt out?  It didn’t matter, I am the Mom, put the kids first and no matter what never ever admit you are tired.  Bottle it up baby.  Put that smile on your face and pretend like everything is fine.  That’s what we do in the Suburbs, right? 

Then sitting in that dressing room I saw something, something new.  It was a crack.  A Mama, sitting next to me sighing at her Blackberry, looking just about as tired as I felt.  Was someone else feeling this crazy ass Dance Mom Fatigue?  A look around the room revealed, not all was well with the Dance Moms.  There were some Mama’s shaking their heads, some rubbing their foreheads,  and was that a tear?  I decided to go for it; I opened a can of worms.

I simply declared; “I am not the best Mama I can be on Dance Competition days.”  Nods started immediately.  That’s all it took!!  The Dance Mamas let loose;

“So much pressure to have everything right.” 

“This morning I could NOT find one headpiece.  One feather.  I tore my house apart trying to find one teeny little piece of costume!  It will take me hours to clean up the mess I made.” 

“It’s stressful to get all the ducks in a row, have the million pieces of costumes ready, the make-up organized, the hair right!”

“Oh and to get to competitions on time, to not get lost, to find parking and keep these babies calm.  I stress, they stress, I sweat, we yell…it’s not good.”


Revelation:  I am not alone, the Dance Mama’s of the Suburbs are freak in tired by the end of the season and our wants, our biggest hearts desires?  They are simple;

Some help from the Hubby’s getting the little’s organized for the day. 

An understanding that this Toddler’s and Tiara’s Hair and Make-Up does not happen on it’s own.  If you can’t help, then stay the hell out of the way.

Perhaps some assistance making hotel arrangements or printing directions for your directionally challenged wife when she is headed out of town. (clearly this one is all me)

Provide a cheering section for your little dancer. (and maybe your Wife)

Maybe make a little dinner. 

When we are away at a three day event, tidy the house up a bit while we are playing chauffer, manager and cheering squad. 

When we come back allow us a place to hide (away from the kids we love the most) for a few minutes to unwind.  Just a bath, by ourselves?  That would be awesome. 

…or maybe what we really need is something more straight forward, a Sister Wife?

Just saying.


  1. ha. its like any sport…it wears you out…even when we are not the one playing…end of the season feels good…and then the next one starts…ha…

  2. Sisterwife! Best.comment.ever

  3. Melissa says:

    Oh I have so been there!! I’m ready for this year to be over !!

  4. What?!! A sister wife? ha ha ha I like it.

  5. I’m with you honey. After a weekend soccer tournament, a Monday night dance dress rehearsal and Tuesday and Wednesday night dance recitals I am ready for a rest! (And the house is a mess!) Hang in there!

  6. We are in the middle of 2 seasons right now, soccer/baseball and gymnastics/dance. I feel like my head is going to explode! Tonight each kid has a different activity scattered all over town. *sigh*

  7. Grande!!!
    Ti stimo!!!

  8. At least you only have a couple more weeks left and then you will get a break. But also take time to enjoy the craziness because one day you will miss these years/times!

  9. Ha, sister wife….whole new can of worms 🙂 Yes, it is exhausting and nice to see the end in sight [for a bit anyway]. Just remember, everyone feels the same way, and you are entitled to feel that way!

  10. When massive pressure is placed on kids, our society has pushed them too far. I wish we could go back to the days of kids being kids with skinned knees and not a care in the world.

  11. Your post actually made me a little teary – what moms will do (even when they are exhausted) to support their loved ones is amazing!

    Your girls are lucky to have such an amazing mama like you.

    Enjoy the times and chaos now – they are the memories you are going to look back on in years and tell your grandkids about 🙂

  12. Your definitely not alone. Hope it all goes smoothly and enjoy the break when it comes. Your daughter looks just like you!!! (gorgeous)

  13. You are almost there….so close to the finish line for THIS season. 🙂
    Your girls will have only good memories when it is all over with.
    I never thought I would get through those (9) years of year round travel ball….and now we can’t believe we don’t do it anymore.
    Rest up Mama!

    • Stephanie says:

      Confession: As much as I adore all their sports, I can’t wait for the slower pace of summer! I know in just a couple of years I will lok back and wish for these crazy hectic days!

  14. Alexis aka mom says:

    I so miss dance as child but now I can see why my mom didn’t let me go on to the competion side too much traveling. Pit ur feet up mom when u can!

  15. I know that not only did your daughters feel supported, but you helped the other moms to release a pressure valve too. You’re a darling. 🙂

  16. Victoria Ess says:

    I hope you find some time in between all the running around and being a mom, for rest and relaxation and being you! Wonderful, wonderful you!

  17. Just found this. Dance classes start tomorrow for another year for us. Sigh.

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