Seeking Revenge On The Dude Who Parks In The Drop Off Only Zone

My Hubby is away.  He is on a “work” vacation.   Yah, five minutes discussing work followed by six rounds of golf, seven marathon card games and a ridiculous amount of eating and drinking. I’m okay with it.  Really.
I’m just tired and as it turns out, a tad whiny. 
Want to hear something ironic?  When the Hubby is here I complain that I can’t sleep because he snores so damn loud.  When he’s not here, I can’t sleep because the house is too quiet.  Gee, waffle much?
Anyway, this lack of sleep, this single parenting, doing all the driving, all the cooking (oh did I ever mention that the Hubs does a good deal of the cooking thus creating a super spoiled wife) and all the EVERYTHING is making me a tad short tempered. 
When I pulled into the parking lot to pick my girls up after school, my head was pounding, I was cold and miffed because it was snowing again stupid groundhog knows nothing and there he was….. “the I don’t care about the rules, I am completely self involved and I will park wherever the bleep I want man”.  I actually just refer to him as Pervy BMW Guy, because he’s got that going for him too.  This man, he parks WHERE EVER he wants with no regard for children’s safety, rules of the road, or just plain old common courtesy. 
Handicapped spot.  He parks there. 
Principals spot.  He parks there. 
Block the busses in?  Yep, that’s him. 
Today, when I got to the school, Pervy BMW Guy was blocking the Pick Up Only area of the parking lot.  It’s pretty self explanatory.  It’s PICK UP ONLY.  You drive up, pick up, get out of there.  Not park your slimy butt there and stare at all the Mama’s butts as they hustle out of their cars to get their children.  Sigh.  Rude. 
I circled around the crowded school parking lot twice.  My girls came skipping  out of school and into the pick up only area. I pulled behind Pervy BMW Guy and promptly got good and blocked in.  I counted to 10.  Still blocked in.  I gave him a little wave to get him to move forward.  Nope, still blocked in.  Then I did what every over tired, super grumpy, cold, headachy Mama in the suburbs would do…… I leaned on that horn with all my might and threw that perv the finger! 
Bah!  No I didn’t, but I did grind my teeth and toot my little Volvo horn.
Such a chicken rebel. 
Next steps, plotting real revenge on all who cross the Mama’s  by blocking the Pick Up Only.  All ideas welcome, cause clearly I need help.


  1. O I feel you …. my husband is away on business quite often these days leaving me to also do EVERYTHING! It can be tough going so you have all my empathy! Unfortunately I don’t have any advice for your on how to handle mr Pervy BMW Guy since I’m probably an even bigger chicken than what you and try to avoid confrontations as far as possible … but I have a friend who thinks that you should get some No Parking stickers and just slap some of those on his BMW… he might just get the hint.

  2. If he’s a repeat offender I would confront him. Or complain to someone in the school and have them confront him. It must mess things up for the school staff too when kids are coming and going.

    I let a couple people have it in the grocery store parking lot the other day- they took up the last “customer with infant” parking spots- no infants, not even any car seats in their cars. It was the end of the day and I was at the end of my patience, and people like that think they’re above the rules and deserve to be called out.

  3. Well, this suggestion involves work(I know annoying). My neighbour is on this parking patrol thing at her kids school, it’s a pick up only zone in one with some parking and parking on the street, 10 minutes a day in the morning and afternoon a group of angry moms patrol, if people don’t listen the cops show up and give out massive tickets.

    All this happened because a little girl died in the parking lot, hit by a double parked car. So, I would go to the administration about this guy, tell them to do something(and you can use my example if you like, just email me and I can email you the entire history). Alternatively gather up all the angry moms and plot revenge, sit on his car, embarrass him.

  4. I totally think you should have laid on the horn and gave him the finger. He deserves it. Hope your husband is home soon. I hate when mine is away. I hear you on the cooking, I don’t do it either. Real rude awakening when he is gone..

  5. I am all bark and no bite so I probably wouldn’t have even tooted my horn. I just would have sat there and stewed. As a timid person, I wouldn’t want to start confrontation. I would probably schedule an appointment with the principal to discuss how BMW is holding up the traffic pattern and causing disturbance. I’m sure announcements have already been made via newsletter, so maybe they will be willing to station a teacher there for a few days. The teacher can give him the “keep moving” signal and approach him if he doesn’t listen. He needs to be directly called out, but not by you. Who knows how crazy he is. Anyone willing to park in a handicapped spot or the principal’s spot is a major douche (excuse my language).

  6. get you an air horn….ok the above comment is much more sensible…

  7. Sensible, shmensible, get the air horn. I doubt you’re the only one annoyed by that jerk!!

  8. i absolutely and TOTALLY get ya! Our parking lot/kiss n ride is INSANE too! parked cars, cars parked in a line behind the parked cars, and the slow moving kiss n ride lane..
    We used to have a security guy, but i have no idea where he went!(likely gave up! lol)
    I have to be there by 3:12 to ensure i get a spot for when my kids finally come out at like 3:37! ugh! (lots of tweeting and coffee drinking in that 25 mins! lol)

  9. He certainly has some nerve. Isn’t there someone there to keep people moving? Next time give him the finger and guess who will get in trouble! Sometimes we just can’t win.

  10. I am the same, look forward to my husband going away so I get the bed to myself then have a terrible nights sleep because I hate being home alone. And then because I feel lonely I end up putting one of the boys in bed with me and getting even less sleep!!

  11. How much do you like your car? You could give his BMW a little bump and then play innocent with evil satisfaction. I would put a scratch or small dent in my car for that satisfaction 🙂

  12. You could “accidentally” trip and a huge mochachino *gasp* spread itself all over his nice shiny Beemer;-) Maybe he won’t park there anymore if he gets Starbucks “accidentally” all over or the next day it could again “accidentally” hit his car blocking any other part of the lot;-) This is why I homeschool, I don’t play well with others LOL!

  13. So annoying. I would try to block him in somehow. Na, probably not but I’d want to.

  14. Oh, that’s just so wrong. And so painful for you! I have a guy in the neighborhood who parks in the drop off zone at the grocery store every single time. Amazes me.

    And I hate that rodent named Phil!

  15. He has no idea how lucky he is that YOU have so much self control!!! Idiot!!!

  16. I’m going to have to think on this one. Because I would love to help you exact your revenge. Rule-breakers in the school parking lot are one of my BIGGEST pet peeves!

    I’m sorry for your single mom status – I too am a spoiled wife, and when the hubs is absent, I really feel it!!

  17. Oh, that would drive me in sane! At the beginning of the year, we’d have parents drop off kids using the Buses only loop. Whenever I was on duty, I would have to remind them that is was for buses only. Because apparently some people can’t read.

  18. I know how you feel! I have dealt with a lot of people like this. Give him a taste of his own medicine and block him in! He’ll probably confront you then you can let him have it! Good luck!

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