It’s Like A Disease

Asked to volunteer for something, I have to say yes.

Sent out a group e-mail only to realize I’m not being addressed in the replies.  Do something to fix that!

Heard the same story six times about the time your dog had a C-Section.  I just keep nodding along.

You can’t make it?  Oh I will shuffle everything to accommodate.  It’s in my nature. 

Misunderstood?  Must fix it right away.  Obsess about it until things are set straight.  I’m uncomfortable until everything is right.  Physically. 

Politely ask the woman blocking the cross walk to move her car, that little kindergartner just about got run over, and she gives me the finger? Oh wait…don’t really care about her.

I worry too much.

Plan to the extreme.

Try to please everyone.

Can’t we all just get along?

I want, need to make everyone happy.

It’s like a disease.

I belong to a very sad club.  The People Pleasers,  and I’ve had enough.  Time to join that other club over there.  The “I don’t give a crap what anyone thinks” club.  They seem pretty confidant, happy, self assured and are hogging all the fun.  Problem is this people pleasing thing? It’s hard to kick.  It’s kind of like a disease?  I’m tired.  Sigh.  Could someone please pass me a big old bucket of “I don’t care”?


  1. I need to join that “I don’t care club” too.

  2. There’s something in between “people pleasing” and “I don’t care” that works for me. I just try not to get myself bent out of shape about stupid people and the things they do. I find that much easier to reconcile with my “make everyone happy” disposition.

    Except for the woman in the crosswalk – I might have to biff her upside the head.

  3. I’ve found that the older I get, the closer I am to being in the I Don’t Give a Crap Club. The shift is almost complete. 😉 I’ve also slowly been losing my filter, which I don’t know if that’s good or bad.

  4. This year I took on being a Girl Scout leader, it’s killing me because I am a people pleaser. I have tried very hard to care less about others and more about myself but its so darn hard. What amazes me is how thoughtless others are, therefor putting it all in the lap of those who do care.

  5. ha. saying no to one thing allows a yes somewhere else…usta be in this club….

  6. It’s such a female disease, too! I am guilty of yessing far too much. We need to put our feet down!

  7. I feel your pain!

    I had a friend once tell me, “When you stop pleasing people, people aren’t pleased.” That always stayed with me.

    Also, I want to believe there’s a balance between “Let me please you” and “I don’t give a crap what you think of me.”

    I haven’t found it yet. I’ll keep you posted. 🙂

  8. if you get that bucket could you dump it on me too?

  9. I’ll join the club too – hopefully there isn’t a secret handshake or anything else I might have to memorize. I have a terrible memory!

  10. It is hard to kick. Over the years I have tried to focus my acts of kindness on my family rather than strangers. I learned years ago with PTA to say no. The reason being it that I was the one they always called when everyone else said no!

  11. I tend to be the same way. I try to make everyone happy and hate the thought that I’ve upset someone. I can talk a good game, but in the end, I have a hard time being nice and I HATE confrontation!

  12. I am also a member of the club. See you at the next meeting.

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  14. My bf tells me that I’m a people pleaser and that I need to think about myself more. It is a curse, but I don’t think I’d really want to change. I don’t want to be someone who’ll give someone else the finger… unless they make me really, really mad and they deserve it. Clearly.

  15. Don’t I know it and it is exhausting, I would love to know how to jump ship.

  16. I used to have an OCD-like obsession about being a people pleaser. Then, like you, I realized that the grass REALLY is greener on the other side. So I’m firmly in the I-don’t-give-a-crap camp now. Lots of room for you here.

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