Um, He’s A Butt Licker?

After baseball tonight Coach took the entire girls team out for ice cream.  Sweetness.

The parents all gathered around the giant picnic style tables and marvelled at how eight screaming 9 year old girls could be momentarily silenced by the power of ice cream.  

As the babies licked and dribbled their way through their melty cones, I did my best to participate in the halting and strangely awkward conversation between strangers.  Seems if we’re not talking baseball there’s not much to say!  The “rip roaring” conversation about a day spent on the lake was blessedly interrupted with a question.  Little Raquel wanted to know if she could give Coach’s puppy a bit of her ice cream?  “Sure” came the response “This pup loves ice cream”.

Raquel proceeded to lean over and offer the pup a lick.  Straight off her cone!  Then giggled and took a lick herself. “She likes it” Raquel squealed, and gave that dog another taste.  I may have gagged just a little. 

I looked around at the 10 or so other “parental figures”. Everyone was smiling and nodding.  Me?  I was trying not to throw up in my mouth.

One more lick for the dog, and then that little girl finished her cone.  

Inside I was screaming. “No NO NOOO. Ug, germs. Gross. Do you have any idea where that dog has been?  Dogs will eat ANYTHING.  Puppies lick their own butts and eat their own poo and you people are all smiling and grinning thinking this is cute?  This is disgusting.”

Time for me to grab my girls and leave now!  Have to go throw up. Thanks for the ice cream Coach, and the education.  Apparently in the Suburbs dog ass flavoured ice cream is all the rage.


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  1. Oh no. I’d be throwing up too. I have a friend that let’s her dog lick her on her mouth. I’ve actually asked to not do that in front of me anymore. Gross!

  2. mmm…..urk, urk…nope not eating after an animal…

  3. LOL! Love it!

  4. LOL! Yeah, I stopped letting my dogs lick me after I caught them licking themselves in their not so clean places, lol.

  5. That is yucky for sure!!!!!

  6. Gross! Gross! Gross!!!!!

  7. Eeewwwww.

  8. There is NO way! I have never understood that kind of thing at all.

    PS. Did we exchange cells for BlogHer yet? We need to!

  9. I’m not overly fond of sharing my ice cream with my own children. The ones I grew in my body. Allowing a dog to lick my ice cream? Uh, no.

  10. Yuck!

  11. EWWWW! Super horribly disgusting!
    I barely share ANYTHING of mine(food-wise) even with my own children or man! yuck!

  12. Ewwwwwwwwwww, sick, sick sick!

  13. you know, a dog’s mouth isn’t any dirtier than a human’s mouth… but then again i wouldn’t share my cone with anyone, two or four legged!

  14. Ugh. I will share my cone with a puppy when I am done licking…not before.

  15. If it makes you feel sorta kinda better, they do say a dog’s mouth is cleaner than a human’s… No? Still not feeling better 😉

  16. Barf. I would have totally freaked too.

  17. @RossanaWyatt says:

    Totally with you there- eww! Never believed that saying about a dog’s butt being cleaner than a humans.I love my dog, but the butt licking is gross! Definitely would not let my child lick a cone after the dog did! Yuck!

  18. Yep, I would have a problem with that, too. Imagining it, puts a puzzled look on my face.

    Although, I’ll admit that I watch my kids let our dog lick them all over their faces, which of course, hits the lips here and there.

    Personally, can’t do it. If the dog licks me on the lips, I’m wiping and feeling gross, so I try not to be in a position where it can happen.

    When my dog comes near my mom, she says, “No licky licky.” Good motto!

  19. HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! Don’t forget they eat their own barf, too! Gross. Were either of her parents there? I wonder if anyone else was thinking what you were thinking, but forced a smile on their faces? Somebody should’ve told her! LOL!

  20. Ewe is right! Though when I was little I used to let my dog lick my feet 🙂

  21. Well I will be the odd one out there, I do share things with my dog. I wouldn’t do it with someone else’s dog. Also my dog is not into licking herself down there (wink*)and that’s the truth!

  22. If you don’t think about it, it doesn’t seem so bad . . . and clearly, no one else was thinking about it! Ha!

  23. I am so totally grossed out. Imagine giving her parents kisses good night

  24. O.K. you have to write another post right way…I can’t get that image out of my head…UGH.

  25. HA! You said “Rip roaring”! LOVE THAT!

  26. Oh yuck! I don’t think I could have NOT said something!

  27. Eeew, and it’s true!

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