The Day I Banned Sleep Over’s?

At first, we couldn’t believe our luck.  There was no way this could be happening to us both girls invited to sleep over’s on the very same night?  Happy Dance!  Now, don’t get all judgey on me.  Unless there is a wedding or a big fat trip (once every six years) Hubby and I get about one evening alone in the house per year; sans kids.  I love my girls but this was a super special treat to have them off having a great time and us ALONE in the house!  Again with the Happy Dance. Doo do doo.

Delivered dear daughters to their sleepover and the night was ours.  We were free to -drink-dance-party!  Um, we didn’t do those things because we are old.  We put the top down on the convertible, went and bought the highest calorie ice cream we could find, and ended the evening out with a moonlit drive.  Back home, a late night movie and we just enjoyed the quiet.  We’re all kinds of crazy like that. Truthfully this a perfect evening for me. 

The next morning we got up bright and early and went to pick up our little darlings.  I have to tell you something…they were not the same little people we had dropped off the night before! 

Our sweet, polite, fun loving, playful girls had been replaced by dirty, sweaty, whining, crying, snivelling, exhausted beasts.  I insisted they have a nap.  They told me they were not tired.  I encouraged them to rest in front of the TV, they cried and emphatically told me they didn’t need to rest.  Too tired to eat, every word a whine, tears, fights, and more tears.  My two pre-teens had turned back into toddlers acting like they had missed their nap times.  Hysterical and happy one moment, blubbering puddles of snot the next. 

I reached my breaking point with these tiny little creatures who had turned our sunny pool day into a scene from Super Nanny, and ordered them to their rooms.  (I needed a time out.)

Then I started wondering bitching to my husband, are sleepovers worth it?  Yes, Hubby and I had a fabulous relaxed worry free date night, but at what cost?   My sweet girls were two exhausted drama queens…ruined for the day…and they took the rest of this family along for the ride. 

Honestly, I might be the first Mama in the Suburbs who plays a brand new card from the parenting deck and  declares…No More Sleep Over’s.


  1. I was just thinking the other day that I couldn;t wait for the boys to have sleepovers, maybe I need to rethink!

  2. I soooooo get this. I have SIX daughters and same thing. It is worth it however, for you and your hubby. My girls love to sleep so they usually would just go straight up to their rooms and crash, lucky me. Enjoy you blog. How DO YOU get 3,000 followers? Please check out my blog sometime at or find me @madreminutes on Twitter. Undergoing breast cancer surgery on WED so would appreciate your prayers.
    Kindest regards,

  3. Yep. Sounds familiar. Even worse is when the sleepover is at your house! Who came up with the name, “sleepover”, anyway? It’s just dumb. There’s no sleeping!

  4. Thanks for the tip on signing in. I’ll try that.

    i was looking forward to sleep overs. now not so much.

  5. We’ve let my DD spend the night at my parents 3-4 times (ever, she’s 6) and this is her when she comes home! They let her eat junk, stay up until 1 AM, sleep in bed with her (so she doesn’t actually sleep) then when she wakes at 4 A.M. they let her get up! Even a couple hours with them (she runs the show) gives us sleepover syndrome.

    So, we haven’t had a night alone since our friends’ wedding 3yrs ago UNLESS you count when my son was born in 2009. OMG what a nightmare dealing with that behavior and a brand new baby!

  6. haha…yeah we have to watch the sleepovers…all that compressed time together tends to cross polinate bad habits…lol

  7. I totally understand what you wrote. After a peaceful adult night you wonder if it’s worth the day after the sleepover when the children are to crabby and over tired.

  8. Sleepovers are not for sleeping. I had the no sleepover card in my deck when the boys were little, so you are not the first one to use it! Definitely not worth it in my opinion.

  9. i TOTALLY wouldn’t blame you for the ban.. sometimes you do what you got to!!

  10. There really is nothing better than a night home alone. I’d take it over going out any time. But, yes, it comes at a cost! A full day of pain. Tough decision!

  11. I know a lot of moms who don’t allow sleepovers to begin with because of the risk of sexual abuse, apparently. I don’t have kids, so I can’t say what I will do, but I think I would allow them.

  12. Pretty sure my personality is not conducive to sleep overs at my house. I think I’m going to have to buck up though – my daughter is dying to have one!

  13. Oh, it sounds like their two sleepovers were missing ONE thing: SLEEP!!!
    We have at least one sleepover here a week….if not more. But I always make sure the kids get some sleep…even the OLD teenagers!

  14. I knnnooowwww!!!! we have been going thru this lately and it’s ban time at Chez McGillicutty too.
    Especially when I saw my kids friend declare on FB that they had broken their record and stayed up ALL NIGHT!
    Well savor the flavor young ladies ‘cos that’s the last time!!!
    When kids sleep at our house they are sleepin’ whether they like it or not!

  15. p.s. I sound like such a party pooper… I guess I am. Oh well.

  16. I wouldn’t rule them out, just expect the post-sleepover hangover. I’d trade almost anything for a quiet night with the huz.

    Also, threaten them with no sleepovers ever again if they can’t get it together the next day.

  17. Oh, I totally get it! It is so frustrating when they come home so exhausted. Emily came home yesterday and was griping at her brother.

    We do limit them! …and I am the mom who hates to host them…I am not a morning person so I absolutely hate having them here. We will be having one in August but they will be out in a tent! 🙂

  18. Oh, you are not alone in wanting to ban sleepovers! My mom would always complain about how tired my sister and I would be when we’d get home the next day… completely miserable! And I know I will one day let my boys sleep over at their friends homes too even though we know it’s better for our sanity that they do not!

  19. Oh sleepovers. I remember those days. Caboodles and cookie dough. Trying to stay up all night. I was smart enough to come and take a nap though! Your girls are crazy for trying to stick it out!

  20. Oh my! I guess I should be glad we aren’t in sleepover range yet! That doesn’t sound fun & my kids tend to be that way all on their own anyway!

  21. Amen to that! I haven’t banned them entirely, but I do make sure that we have nothing critical planned for the following day. The girls are brutal the next day, but the shot of whiskey I force them to drink generally encourages napping. ; )

  22. or… the next time, just welcome them home with a hot chocolate laced with gravol, voila! they’ll take themselves to bed for a nice nap, problem solved!

    i’d be such a cool mom, LOL! ;-D

  23. I remember staying up all night at sleepovers! It always seemed like so much fun. Never thought of the torture my parents would go through the next day!

  24. I have been singing this tune for a while now. The breaking point for me was a birthday sleepover with a bunch of 12-year-old boys who didn’t go to sleep until 5am only to wake up at 8am. No thanks!! Hold your ground sister.

  25. at least you had a good night before the madness set in though right??

  26. I know exactly what you mean about the crappy grouchy attitudes. BUT – it’s still worth it!! Especially since you get so little time alone with your hubby. Maybe plan the next day to be really low-key, if possible.
    Just don’t be the one to host them, especially not with a bunch of kids! Then you’ll ALL be grouchy the next day. LOL

  27. That’s the absolute truth. I remember that completely, even for myself. I never even bothered to try to deal with the crap either. I just sent them straight to bed to sleep it off!

  28. Linked over from a commet on another blog- I hear you on this subject completely. That is why we have changed to having ‘late nights’. The kids still get to hang out with their friends until 10-11ish then come home to sleep in their own beds. It has made a difference to all parties involved.

  29. Linked over from a commet on another blog- I hear you on this subject completely. That is why we have changed to having ‘late nights’. The kids still get to hang out with their friends until 10-11ish then come home to sleep in their own beds. It has made a difference to all parties involved.

  30. I know just what you mean…. I have 3 girls and we rarely do sleepovers anymore!!

  31. sound like my little one when she gets back from her Grandparent’s house.. and she is 3 1/2 it is a day from excuse me.. Hell..

  32. Yeah well, wait until they are in college and you try banning sleepovers at their boyfriends house. They come back whiny and drama queens from those nights too.

  33. I think they are a great experience for the girls. I know I use to come home and sleep when I was a kid. Sorry they were so crabby. I think your free night was worth the pain!

  34. As a mom of a 3 year old VERY DRAMATIC little girl this whole post just scared the life outa me. I am now very nervous about sleepovers, hopefully I have a few more years before we get there.

  35. Sounds like a great date night to me too! Because I am old. And I totally hear you on the sleepover thing, we ALWAYS end up paying for it!

Speak Your Mind (Rest assured, email addresses will not be shared)