Want to hear the truth about Thanksgiving?
Well, it's great.
As long as it is at someone else's house!!
Spend 2 days cleaning up your home. If you are anything like me. Procrastinate so much you still end up doing some crazy kind of shuffle and hide so your house is presentable before the first guest arrives.
Spend a few hundred dollars shopping for the essentials..then send the Hubby out in a panic because you forgot the Cranberry sauce that Grandma simply must have.
Oh good grief. Don't forget the booze eh?
Then let the cooking begin!
Let's talk Turkey.
Raw Poultry is truly disgusting.
Seriously! Have you ever really looked at that poor dimpled skinned turkey before you stuff it's butt and neck full of bread and seasoning? Ug. Big Gag factor. BIG! Plus you are supposed to massage it with butter? Huh? Forget it. If I'm not massaging my Husband, I'm sure as hell not massaging a dead bird.
Get that bird in the oven in the nick of time.
Yell at the kids that yes they must wear the clothes you put out for them.
Beg your Hubby to turn the football off, just for a couple of hours.
Sprint through the shower.
Coral the pets.
One last vacuum.
Check the potatoes and disgusting bird.
Ahhhh. Ready.
.
.
.
.
Then they are freakin late! Are you kidding me.
When all your tardy guests do finally arrive. Get a nice visit in.
Eat that huge meal you spent 2 days preparing for as fast as any Big Mac Combo.
Sit back in your squeaky wood dinette chair that is only used 3 times a year and enjoy your moment of satisfaction.
There, did you enjoy it?
Good moment over.
Now go look at the flipin dishes!
It looks like a small bomb went off in there!
But don't worry, I'm sure you lovely FAMILY will help. Nope,they have to run.
Mwah, Mwah.
Do dishes for two more days.
UG.
The only saving grace.
You get the leftovers.
Happy Belated Thanksgiving Y'all.
Hope you get to go to your Mother In Laws House!
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46 comments:
The left overs are the BESTEST! My fav is a big fat turkey sandwich that includes turkedy (obviously), stuffing and cranberry sauce!
Happy Belated Thanksgiving!
Hey wait a minute. You just described our house.
I despise doing the dishes on Thanksgiving! Last year it took me over an hour to do them (by myself). Everyone else was sleeping. I hate my family. ;)
Girl....SO true!
I still have a little over a month before I have to deal with all this. Your description of the "event" is hilarious! Still, I'm looking forward to it, and may even be hosting this year. Yikes!
Happy (Belated) Thanksgiving!
I am so OVER entertaining for the holidays, I just want Chinese take out from now on.
Happy Thanksgiving, Dear MM!
Yes! That dimply poultry skin is disgusting... it sure does taste good fried. LOL!
That sounds like a lot of work! And exactly the reason I didn't do it this year!
It is soooo much work. I do it all for my family. Just six of us eating but it is always worth it.
Love the meal, hate the work, love the leftovers, need the wine!
That was a long post for you!
Happy belated Thanksgiving! We got calls in from my sisters-in-law and they were complaining of the amount of food they had eaten for Thanksgiving... Well, I'm thankful that we don't really celebrate Thanksgiving over here. (Although it would be nice...)
Sounds like a great visit. The bird is not disgusting, you could go prestuffed, and cook from frozen and not even have to look at him. :)
Some years the greasy mess in the kitchen makes me want to run away. But the family sit down is still worth it.
Secretia!
Oh, and? After that initial shuffle and hide, when I need some of that stuff you hid, I can't find it when I need it $%^&!!!
This is very funny. I do the same thing, but we DO have it here every year for the same amount of folks...but 1/2 of them are STAYING at my house, so they get to help with the prep and clean up. I love it though...nothing better than leftover turkey and potatoes!!!!
Glad you survived.
I became official family host of every occasion since we built the house. I have also decided that we will eat whatever it is that I want to cook. No mashed potatoes? They'll get over it, or volunteer to either bring or host next year.
So far that hasn't worked like I thought it would, but they've stopped complaining about the food, too.
LOL, I'm dreading out Thanksgiving day too.. Sounds you described my house to a T!
Thanksgiving food is my least favorite all year....my entire family loves it but my Hub and I really don't. LOL. Thankfully we also aren't hosting yet..my Hub's entire family eats and then sleeps. No thanks. :)
See, this is why Turkey day is at my MOM's!! And, she gives us the leftovers. Everybody wins!!
Left overs are the BEST! Hope you had a good one! :)
yea i TOTALLY hate the mess that cooking for a large group entails.. seriously!
Last year I begged my family to have Thanksgiving in our new house. Thankfully, my incredible in-laws took over with the turkey as I found myself absolutely clueless and frozen on what to do with the enormous, headless corpse.
This year I am begging to have it somewhere else where I can sit lazy and happily drinking all the wine and stuffing myself, instead of the turkey.
Thank you for visiting my website. Glad to find other wannabe travelers that I can commiserate with.
I see that Canadian Thanksgiving is the same chaotic event that it is here in the states. Wish me luck, as our is a month or so away - although, my husband is the cook. I'm the cleaner.
But...I guess being with friends and family is worth it.
But it's so fun!! I want to cook a turkey this year. I've never cooked one. I'm excited to make it for my neighbors! Hopefully I'll cook it properly and we won't end up at a Chinese Food resturant. lol
My beef with Thanksgiving is family related and due to that, I am contemplating boycotting it, staying home, and cooking lobster.
I lucked out! A friend invited my family over this year. I normally have the crowd. No stuffing the turkey's but for me this year.
Oh dear I totally forgot it is Thanksgiving in your neck of the woods! Ah yes, did that last year, FIASCO!! I had too many managers in my kitchen...literally looked like one of those damn reality shows.
But the kicker...I love to cook! So I took my gluttonous pain in pride.
Happy Thanksgiving and I bet you pulled the whole ordeal off BEAUTIFULLY!
Hope you were able to find some bliss amidst the chaos! A big, leftover turkey sandwich with a slice of leftover pie always does it for me!
I think you just described EVERY family event at my house minus the turkey. Honestly, it's clean up before, during and after & a total pain in the ass sometimes.
I started doing Thanksgiving at my house a couple years ago just for the leftovers. :)
OMG, this sounds so familiar! Glad you survived and yes, so did we. Now if only Christmas dinner wasn't just a little over two months away!
Deb
Hahahaha!
I LERRRRRRRRRVE Thanksgiving Dinner...
See...
I must prepare it. I don't trust anyone else and their sanitation processes...Because see I use:
Gloves
Bleach
Bleach, and, oh yeah,
Bleach
And I am very particular about my stuffing, and how the turkey is cooked, and I MUST make Italian Broccoli, not that green bean casserole thingie...and OH! The kids and I have to make the pumpkin pie, and I MUST make my cranberry orange relish...and I use paper plates...PJ's must be worn by anyone that comes over to eat, and they must be willing to eat in the dark, by candlelight, so they don't see the messes I didn't clean up, and PRAISE THE LORD my husband doesn't watch football! So I shower the night before and don't even put on make up. Then the next day I take the rest of the stuffing, dark meat, drippings I saved, celery, onion, carrots, and make a fantabulous turkey stuffing soup and some wicked gooey mac and cheese.
Thanksgiving is my most favorite meal to make. Wanna come over for a second helping?
Sounds like how it works at my house - I am on time. In-laws always LATE! ;-)
You need to do Thanksgiving the way we do Thanksgiving...potluck style. Everyone gets an item to bring, I strategically get mashed potatoes every year because I'm the only one that can make decent potatoes. That's the only hazard, sometimes the person in charge of a certain dish royally screws it up. However, we have learned to give those people the job of bringing the olives or butter.
That is EXACTLY why I never learned to cook!
I buy a nice pie, and go to someone elses house!
Should I be thankful we don't celebrate Thanksgiving over here??!!!
EEEEWWWWWWW! I don't touch raw meat with my bare hands.
I am a control freak!! I love to make the bird myself. My mom's cooking SUCKS!!!
I will never, if I can avoid it, have Thanksgiving at my house. I don't have a big house or a big dining room table, or a dining room for that matter. I am not a good cook and I hate to clean. Not a holiday for me at my house. We go to other people's houses!
You are correct! Always better at someone else's home!
Hmm, after reading this? I may NOT finish my kitchen. Then? I'll never have to host a holiday~
How awesome are you!!! What a great post, and how true. How sad and true. Please tell me at least someone helped you with the clean up!
Enjoy your much deserved left-overs!!
I have seen this scene before..oh yeah my house. Every year I threaten turkey hot dogs (microwaved even!)...everyone laughs, but one day I will do it.
Holly @ 504 Main
Happy late Thanksgiving! I bet it was amazingly delicious. I love the cranberry sauce too. I'm hoping to go to a hotel for American Thanksgiving dinner here in China this year.
I'm here getting caught up on blog reading, finally! Happy Thursday!
Okay....now you're scaring me because I'm THINKING about having Thanksgiving at our house this year but have not committed completely........after reading your post I swear that I just cannot do it! Ugh! Ugh! No way, the cleaning, the cooking, more cleaning and then even more cleaning. And the dishes!?
I'm calling my SIL right now (which is where we generally have our Thanksgiving at) and convince her that it must be at her home this year! (her kids are grown and out of the house so it's easy peasy for her--more or less! LOL!) She's a great cook whereas I am NOT--giggle giggle!
Anyways, hope you are resting up after your Thanksgiving!
He he. We totally "forgot" it was Thanksgiving and saved all the headache :-D
Are we bad? :-o
I could have written this post. I still have a whole month before I have to deal with the holiday madness, but I'm already dreading it. And don't even get me started on the Christmas Crazies. Whoever said "it's the most wonderful time of year" was either a man or had been dipping into the eggnog.
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